You're a middle aged, not so good looking, married Mahoning Valley man who's in Columbus trying to impress a single woman half your age, so you tell her:

a) You have a doctorate in ancient languages and can recite the Lord's Prayer in Sanskrit.

b) You actually started Microsoft, but Bill Gates stole it from you.

c) You taught LeBron James all he knows about basketball.

d) Your grandfather was in the Mafia and that "no one messes with my crew" and "I can get anything done."

True to his Valley roots, Anthony Gutierrez, the recently fired director of General Services in the Ohio Attorney General's Office, played Mafia card. Did it work?

Well, Gutierrez, of Liberty Township, has been accused of sexually harassing two of his female employees, Cindy Stankoski and Vanessa Stout. The accusations led to an internal investigation which led to his firing.

Bada Bing!

No, Stankoski didn't coo after he told her of his Mafia ties, nor did she ask breathlessly, "Can I touch your gun?" (He has a concealed carry permit, you see.)