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Rust Belt throws a ‘Gay Wedding’
By GUY D’ASTOLFO
YOUNGSTOWN
Rust Belt Theater Company had planned to premiere its new comedy-musical “My Big Fat Gay Wedding” in the spring but moved it up for obvious reasons.
“We originally planned to present ‘Emily Dickinson: Vampire Slayer’ in the September slot, but with the recent ruling by the Supreme Court on marriage equality, we decided ‘My Big Fat Gay Wedding’ was the more timely choice,” said Robert Dennick Joki, who wrote the show with Josh Taylor and also directs and stars in it.
“Gay Wedding” opens Friday at the Calvin Center, 755 Mahoning Ave., and runs for five performances over three consecutive weekends. Call 330-507-2358 for times and reservations.
The show follows a plus-size, middle-age gay couple as they venture into the new frontier of marriage.
Steve, an anal-retentive event coordinator, gets a surprise proposal by Adam, his partner of 20 years, and must then plan his own perfect wedding. The couple face an array of challenges, including difficult family members, meddling ex-lovers, body-shaming tailors and extreme Christian bakers.
The song titles give an idea of what to expect: “Super Gay Day,” “I’m Planning Weddings for Straight People,” “It Gets Better [Unless You’re Fat],” “Monogamy is for Ugly People” and “Straight ... To the Altar With the Man of My Dreams.”
David Cirelli and Joki play the lead roles of Adam and Steve, respectively. Rounding out the cast are Nicole Zayas, Kage Coven, Marisa Zamary, Luke Hnida, Rachel Clifford, America McNeil, Celena Coven and Lynn Sabeh. Zamary is also the choreographer.
Joki talked about “My Big Fat Gay Wedding” in this exchange:
Q. Writing this musical must have required knowledge of the wedding industry. Have you ever worked in it?
A. One of my major focuses in college was costume construction, so I have made and altered a lot of wedding dresses over the years. It’s something I used to do pretty regularly for extra money. The reason I stopped doing it is that brides can tend to be ... a little impossible. Everyone wants things to be perfect for their special day, and the worst thing you can do is get in between a bride and her vision.
I also spent many years as a wedding singer. I would learn the music, show up at the church, sing, and watch the ceremony. I very rarely knew the couple personally. It was usually set up by the church organist. I remember sitting there thinking “Well ... the gay guy just sang ‘Ave Maria’ for straight people for the 50th time. Still can’t get married himself though.”
One of the things I noticed from participating in all of these weddings over the years is that no matter how meticulously planned the event is, small but hilarious things go wrong. There is always someone, usually the mother of the bride, or the wedding planner, or sometimes the bride herself, barking orders at everyone, trying to maintain order. But the whole ceremony often comes off like a preschool Christmas pageant – herding awkward little children through the motions. Weddings are hilarious. People put themselves into debt for years to dress up in uncomfortable clothes, eat bland food, and put themselves into ridiculous situations, all in the name of love.
Q. It sounds like one underlying theme might be ‘The more things change, the more they stay the same.’ Do the same troubles arise in the planning and execution of a gay wedding?
A. We’ve got years and years of tradition that everyone is used to, that need to be adjusted in the case of a same-sex wedding. Can a nontraditional couple have a traditional wedding? Who gets the engagement ring? Who walks who down the aisle? Who tosses the bouquet? Is there a bouquet? Does the marriage happen in a church? Then there are some of the issues that have been in the media in recent months: Christian bakeries that don’t want to bake a cake for a gay wedding, clerks that don’t want to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples. We touch on all of that in the show.
Q. It’s a comedy, but do you venture into the realities of marriage equality in a serious way?
A. The main characters have been in a committed relationship for over 20 years, and then gay marriage is suddenly legalized. It’s something they never thought would happen in their lifetime. Should they now get married, even though by most people’s standards they have been living as a married couple for two decades? Is the actual ceremony that important? Do they even want a wedding?
Body image comes into play as well. There’s a scene where Steve gets measured for a tuxedo by two brutal, fat-shaming retail workers. There’s a song called “It Gets Better [Unless You’re Fat],” which talks about how liberating coming out of the closet can be, until you realize that difficult people will just find some other reason to discriminate against you. When I talk about serious issues, I usually try to serve them with a generous coating of humor, to keep it from getting too heavy.
One thing that has been really great about working on this show is noticing how much the dynamic has changed between straight people and gay people over the last two decades.
I’ve been openly, and unapologetically, gay since I was 18. David, my leading man, is as straight as straight can be, and he has been a real trooper. Twenty years ago, it would have been difficult to find a straight man who was willing to kiss and be affectionate to a gay man in front of a room full of people. Now it’s no big deal. People are more accepting.