KARZMER: Parent’s love goes long way for achievers

As the father of an 18-month-old child, holidays like today, Mother’s Day, present a dual reflection period for me.

As a son and grandson of some extremely special women, it offers a day of past reflection. I’m lucky because I can look back fondly on 34 years’ worth of memories surrounded by love and encouragement from the most important women in my life.

But as a father and a husband, those same memories translate into visions of the future.

I don’t know how many “personality tests” I’ve taken over the years for potential employers, but I know my results have come back consistent throughout, with “analytical” always towards the top of my list.

So it’s in that regard that I offer a Mother’s Day wish to my mother, my wife, and all of the other moms out there with children who are passionate about an activity or sport.

May your children grow up with a passion for something the way I obviously was about golf. And may you have the parenting skills to let them experience that passion to their maximum enjoyment.

I was lucky to grow up in a family dynamic that gave me the opportunity to pursue and play the sport I loved — golf. And now as a parent, I often ask myself the question; “What did my mom and dad do really well that I want to repeat with my daughter?”

There’s the question of nature vs. nurture. How much of my ability and love for the game was I born with versus instilled in me by my parents?

There’s the question of “push” vs. “provide.” How much of my success and enjoyment came from my parents pushing me to get better versus them simply giving me the access to the game to get better and enjoy it on my own.

And now as I sit here and type, there are a ton of other family dynamic variables that come to mind — financial, skill levels, competitiveness, siblings, grandparents, work schedules, access, etc.

Obviously, I’m measuring my “success” within golf by my love for the game and the personal experiences I’ve had. Jordan Spieth won The Masters. I wrote about it. I understand I’m not writing this column as a “competitively successful” professional golfer.

But I am a successful golfer in terms of the passion and the memories I have for the game. And I had a successful “mom” because of, in part, the love she provided and the memories she’s created and continues to make with me today.

So to go back to my original analytical question — how do I copy the experiences I’ve had for my daughter moving forward? And to be honest, I don’t have an answer.

But here is what I do know — I was lucky. My mom was always there for me. She made the game accessible. She made it fun. She supported me win or lose. She made it competitive. And I never had any doubt in the world that she was my biggest fan.

I know I’ve already provided my daughter with the best “present” I could ever give her, and that’s my wife, Beth, as her “mommy.”

Hopefully one day Stella finds something she’s passionate about.

Beth — I’m sure you’ll do everything right to harness whatever Stell’s passion may be, but if you’re ever looking for a few starting points, see two paragraphs above. My Mom left us with some pretty good ones.

Happy Mother’s Day, everyone.

Jonah Karzmer is a former golf professional who writes a Sunday golf column for The Vindicator. In his spare time he sells commercial insurance and loves getting feedback on his weekly columns via email at Jonah@thekarzmerinsurance.com