Puskas: It’s another not-so-super Sunday

Welcome to my annual “Things I’ll Be Doing Instead Of Watching The Super Bowl” column.

It’s a short list this year:

1. Working.

That’s pretty much the extent of my list.

I’ll be doing my part to bring you the most complete coverage possible of (yet another) Super Bowl between two teams I couldn’t possibly care less about because I grew up a fan of the star-crossed franchise known as the Cleveland Browns.

But even if I had the day off and could spent four hours watching the New England Patriots and Seattle Seahawks ... please see the sentence immediately preceding this one.

Here’s the thing: I’m a Cleveland guy. I like Cleveland things:

The Indians and the Cavaliers. Tremont and the MetroParks Zoo.

The West Side Market and Little Italy. Big Chuck and Lil’ John and Drew Carey.

And, yes, the Browns.

And even though I won’t be watching today, I like the Super Bowl. But thanks mainly to John Elway, it’s never been a Cleveland thing.

But this is not a referendum on The Drive, The Fumble and that other AFC Championship loss to the Denver Broncos.

Question: Why doesn’t that last one have a name ESPN can periodically use to torture Cleveland fans?

It’s just that most Browns fans never dreamed 1989 would be the last time Cleveland would be one win from a Super Bowl.

But then the Browns of the Kosar Era got old and Art Modell — bleeding money from his own awful business decisions — moved the team to Baltimore.

Thankfully, that paved the way for a new team and even more awful draft picks and coaching hires.

So pardon me if Super Bowl Sunday doesn’t mean much to me anymore.

The older I get, the less interested I get in seeing other teams play in it and other fans relish the experience.

The best Cleveland fans can do today is eat chicken wings and watch Bill Belichick — who coached the Browns a generation ago — try to win another Super Bowl.

But there are some regional subplots for Ohioans:

Sherman Smith, the Seahawks’ running backs coach, is a Youngstown native and North High graduate.

Belichick’s father, Steve, grew up in Struthers and is a member of the school’s Hall of Fame.

Patriots offensive coordinator Josh McDaniels is the son of former Warren Harding and Canton McKinley coach Thom McDaniels. Josh’s name comes up semi-annually when the Browns are looking for a coach.

If you’re really desperate for a Browns angle, there is New England tight ends coach Brian Daboll, who used to be Cleveland’s offensive coordinator.

Sorry, I know. Like most Browns fans, you probably tried to forget Daboll.

If only we could forget Jimmy Haslam so easily.

Some teams — the Seahawks, Patriots, Steelers, 49ers and Broncos — reward their fans with Super Bowls regularly. The Browns paid their followers back with a ticket-price increase last week.

That is not a typo. After a 7-9 season — admittedly their best in several years — the Browns decided to raise the price of a seat at The Factory of Sadness.

Question: Do I have to pay Mike Polk Jr. a royalty for using that term? Put it on my tab.

Write Vindicator Sports Editor Ed Puskas at epuskas@vindy.com and follow him on Twitter, @EdPuskas_Vindy.