Alzheimer's dulls memory, not Austintown couple's love

By Denise Dick | November 23, 2014 at 12:01a.m.

By DENISE DICK

denise_dick@vindy.com

AUSTINTOWN

Five years after his diagnosis, Alzheimer’s disease nicks at Barry Claycomb.

He forgets people’s names, loses track of tasks, gets aggravated with himself.

But that’s not the whole story.

He and JoAnn, his wife of 49 years, prefer to focus on the positives in their lives instead of dwelling on the negatives.

“What am I going to do, sit here and say, ‘Boo-hoo, why did this happen to me?’” Barry, 70, said.

He knows he’s slipping, but he takes it one day at a time.

The couple still laugh together, finish each other’s sentences.

“We’re in God’s hands,” JoAnn said.

This is the fifth year that The Vindicator has visited the couple, who have agreed to tell their story to raise awareness of the disease. November is both National

Alzheimer’s Awareness Month and Family Caregivers’ month.

The disease’s most obvious progression causes safety concerns for the couple.

Barry falls. It happens when he walks and tries to stop.

He’s knows it’s happening but can’t stop it.

“My mind says stop, but my body keeps moving,” Barry said. “I get so irritated with it.”

It doesn’t happen every day, but it’s happened more than once. Mostly he ends up with bumps and bruises, but a fall a few months ago broke his toe. JoAnn’s brother made Barry a walking stick to help his balance.

His frustration sometimes manifests physically, frightening JoAnn, 68.

In a recent episode, Barry couldn’t adjust a screw in a piece of furniture in the house. JoAnn called her grandson who finished the job in a few seconds.

Then she thought she was going to have to call an ambulance for Barry.

“He was shaking so badly,” JoAnn said.

She helped him calm down, and the shaking subsided.

It’s still hard for him to watch other people do things he used to do at home, like installing new brakes on JoAnn’s car. The couple’s son did the work because Barry can’t.

“Barry’s always been a doer, not a watcher,” JoAnn said.

“I don’t like watching other people do my work,” he adds.

But they enjoy each other’s company and the time they have together.

That’s something that wouldn’t be in such ample supply if not for the disease.

For the second year, the couple spent most of the spring and summer at a campground near Johnstown, Pa., Barry’s hometown. It’s their refuge.

“We get up when we want to, go to bed when we want to,” JoAnn said.

There’s no interruptions from the Internet, television or relatives as at home. They sit by the water, watch birds, visit with fellow campers.

If something stresses Barry, he goes for a walk, always taking his cellphone so JoAnn can check on him.

While in town, they spend a lot of time at the Austintown Senior Center. JoAnn participates in the wood carving and painting programs while Barry plays cards or bingo or chats with other people.

Art provides an outlet for JoAnn.

Barry still has bad days. On one of those, he doesn’t want to go anywhere or talk to anyone, and JoAnn lets him be.

Both admit the time will come when caring for Barry at home may become too much for JoAnn, and he’ll need to go into a nursing home. They’ve talked about it and have narrowed it to a few choices.

They’re grateful the disease afforded them time to discuss such things, giving Barry a voice in his future.

JoAnn urges other families affected by Alzheimer’s to educate themselves about the disease: know what to expect, review available options.

Next year marks their 50th wedding anniversary, and Barry wants to take a train ride. JoAnn will begin researching possibilities early next year.

She also plans to buy an anniversary ring after the holidays as a symbol of their long union.

“I want it to be five stones, one for every 10 years,” JoAnn said. “I want Barry to be there, to help pick it out.”