God speaks in subtle ways

“Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.” (1 Kings 19:11)

I so appreciate this chapter and verse. To me it means that God does speak to us, but in ways far more subtle than obvious.

During my pilgrimage I have testily, and regretfully, challenged people of faith regarding their speaking with, listening to, or otherwise communicating with God.

“You prayed and God got you a new job? A winning lottery ticket? A victory in the Super Bowl? How do you know it’s not simply a coincidence” I’d ask.

Or “maybe it’s your subconscious” I’d suggest.

I no longer question others’ experiences with God, for they are on their own personal path.

Skeptics would certainly question the “authenticity” of my three touches during my lifetime with the divine.

My only response would be, as I’ve heard so many others say regarding their experiences, “I just know in a different way than I know anything else.”

So, at risk of ridicule, here are my experiences.

One of the clearest messages I received from God was in Nepal. I was “on safari” riding the back of an elephant trying to catch a rare glimpse of a Bengal tiger. The heat at dawn combined with the swaying of the elephant and as I looked through the morning mist, surrounded by shoulder high weeds, thick-leaved trees, and listening to the unusual sounds of the jungle, I felt a connection with all my surroundings. The feeling was hypnotic. I felt within God, and I felt God within me. A feeling of inner warmth, calmness and peace embraced me.

The second time I felt God’s presence occurred about four years ago. My treasured partner died suddenly and, despite the compassionate help of counselors, friends, and support groups, I was miserable with grief and had no hope for the future.

While browsing a theology book, I chanced to read John 5:1-9, the story of the lame man at the well at Bethesda. As I sat in contemplation of this scripture, my body began to shudder with the feeling of the presence of Jesus and his direct and stern words to the lame man, “Rise, take up your bed, and walk” poured over me.”

Despite all the outside help I was receiving, Jesus was saying it was up to me to take the first step toward a new life. Overwhelmed by the sense of the divine and despite my racing heart, I felt comforted. I began to heal.

As my grief continued to dissipate, I began to re- engage with life.

My sister had recently moved to a small town and invited me to visit. Looking at a map, I realized it was the hometown of a woman I briefly dated while at Ohio State University 35 years earlier.

I asked God, “Would she even remember me? Would she respond?”

Again, through some sheer force, I felt guided, almost compelled, to write her.

Despite having had no communication for over three decades, and mailing it to the wrong address, the letter found her hands.

A faded ember of shared emotions began to blaze once more, and after a long-distance relationship the past three years, I am blessed and thankful. We’ll be married.

Joseph Campbell said that upon reflection in our later years, we have a sense that our life has been guided by “hidden hands.” I agree.

And whenever I have been plunged into darkness, God has said, “Let there be light.”

I’ve heard the whispers.

Tom Bresko of Boardman, retired from Mill Creek Metro Parks, is a Christian on a spiritual pilgrimage.