‘That’s My Boy’ is a bad dad flick

By Roger Moore

McClatchy Newspapers

Vanilla Ice is back, back baby.

And for that crime alone, Adam Sandler should get the chair.

Alas, it’s a minor offense in “That’s My Boy,” a no-holds-barred raunch-fest that combines bits of “Saturday Night Live” skits and “The Hangover” with every ugly Sandler laugher ever made.

Sandler has made worse movies, but never one as grotesque as this.

He stars as Donny Berger, who became famous — notorious — in the ’80s for his illegal fling with Miss McGarricle (Eva Amurri Martino). Donny made a lot of money being the kid who lived Van Halen’s “Hot for Teacher” fantasy — the envy of his (male) peers. Of course, he blew through all that cash. Thirty years later, all he has to show for the glory days are a dated TV movie about the affair, his old Fiero and a whopping tax bill.

Donny’s one hope — find his estranged son, whom he named “Han Solo Berger,” and stage a reunion with the kid and the imprisoned mom on a sleazy TV show hosted by a guy played by sportscaster/Sandler pal Dan Patrick, sporting freakier hair than usual.

Han Solo changed his name to Todd Peterson and grew up to be a dull hedge-fund manager. Todd’s a pushover, the sort of nerd who makes unfunny “beep beep” computer noises when he’s showing off his math skills.

You will not believe how unfunny “Saturday Night Live’s” Andy Samberg can be until you see this guy — a henpecked groom about to marry the shrill Jamie (Leighton Meester).

Tony Orlando plays Todd’s crude and lewd boss. James Caan does the worst Irish accent he could manage, playing a two-fisted priest who will marry the couple.

“That’s My Boy” is a groaner. Yet it’s more appropriate for Father’s Day than you’d think. It’s your aging dad, stuck in the past, swearing and carrying on like he’s just heard about those other guys stealing Mike Tyson’s tiger, assuring you he can top it.