ANNIE’S MAILBOX: Reunion sleepover concerns ‘Midwest’

By Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar

Dear Annie: My husband and I are in our mid-40s, happily married with a wonderful family. In the past two years, my husband has reconnected with some high school friends through social media. I think it is great that they are able to communicate and catch up, since their lives have moved them all over the country. They have had a couple of gatherings, one centered around a formal reunion and the other an informal get-together at a bar.

This is a coed group, although the boys and girls attended separate schools that were only connected through occasional joint activities. I thought it odd that the women were included in the men’s school reunion, especially since their husbands were not invited. But since my husband couldn’t attend either function, I didn’t pay much attention.

Now I am told a long weekend gathering is being scheduled and both men and women will occupy a large home together — men on the second floor and women in the basement, each floor with separate bedrooms and baths. Spouses are not invited.

I think this weekend situation is highly inappropriate for married people and cannot believe I am the only spouse with this concern. I am not sure the others realize what the lodging situation will be. I trust my husband, but don’t know these other people at all, and after 25 years, neither does my husband. I am not naive. I know some of these people are going into the weekend hoping to stir up a little romance. Am I out of line?

Concerned Midwest Spouse

Dear Concerned: Who on earth is planning these alarmingly inappropriate “reunions”? Your husband should notify the event planners that he would love to come but finds the circumstances unappealing and risky and will not attend without his wife. He should also let the others know. We suspect quite a few have similar objections. And consider forming a chat group with the spouses to keep everything aboveboard. There are perfectly innocent ways to have school reunions. You don’t need to encourage affairs by combining them with coed sleepover parties.

Dear Annie: Recently, on a public bus, I noticed a father and his 4-year-old son. The boy was well behaved and was playing with the wheels of his stroller, which were filthy from snow and the muck of city streets. The dad then offered the boy pretzels, which the boy ate with his dirty fingers.

The father might not have noticed that the boy was playing with the wheels, and I know a few germs won’t hurt him, but this would have taxed anyone’s immune system. Medical professionals recommend hand-washing before eating. Should I have offered a tissue or a wipe?

Medical Professional in Boston

Dear Boston: Yes, as long as you smiled and said in a nonjudgmental manner, “In case your son would like to wipe his hands before eating.”

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