ANNIE'S MAILBOX | Mood swings are over the top

KATHY MITCHELL & MARCY SUGAR

Dear Annie: I have been married for seven years and have two children from a previous relationship.

Some time ago, my husband was diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. While we were dating, he showed no sign of mood swings or disturbing behavior, but it has surfaced since we began living together with my children.

Most parents would be happy for their children to take out the trash, wash their own dishes and clean their rooms and bathrooms, which is what my children do. My husband, however, blows his lid when the new trash bag isn’t tied properly to the trashcan or, heaven forbid, someone doesn’t properly close the dishwasher door or there are a few drops of water left on the sink after they wash their hands.

He doesn’t like socializing and has alienated us from many friends and family members because nobody wants to be around him. He is paranoid and always wants the blinds closed and the doors shut.

His mood goes up and down on a daily basis, and therefore, so does mine. I have told him I don’t think his behavior is healthy or normal, but he says I’m too sensitive. I’m an emotional wreck and feel like giving up. How do I know whether this really is PTSD or something else? What should I do?

Stressed Out

Dear Stressed: It actually doesn’t matter what the reason is. Your husband’s behavior is over the top, and he needs to get it under control. Having PTSD, bipolar disorder, anger management issues or any other problem is not carte blanche to treat others poorly. You are suffering, and more importantly, so are your children. Your husband could benefit from counseling, and you should urge him to get it. You also can find excellent information through the VA National Center for PTSD (ptsd.va.gov).

Dear Annie: My mother-in-law works for the Board of Elections. She is constantly looking up personal information about people and passing it on. I know this because she tried to hand me a local TV reporter’s home address so I could drive by and see his big house. She has looked up information on my husband’s ex-girlfriend and most recently told me she looked up a candidate’s voting history and gave it to another candidate’s team.

Isn’t it against the law to be looking up, let alone passing out, this personal information? Couldn’t she get fired?

Not a Gossip Monger

Dear Not a Gossip: Most complaints of misconduct center on abuses that may affect the outcome of the election. Every state is different, and what your mother-in-law did was nosy and unkind, but it may not have been against the law or a violation of the rules set down by her local Board of Elections. Addresses and voting history are public knowledge. Had she given out a Social Security or driver’s license number, that would be a different story.

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