ANNIE’S MAILBOX: It’s time to come clean on smoking

July 27, 2010 at 4:09a.m.

By KATHY MITCHELL and MARCY SUGAR

Dear Annie: I am 18 and have been hiding a dirty secret from my parents for two years. When I started dating my boyfriend, I developed the nasty habit of smoking. At first, it was easy hiding it from my parents, but it’s getting a lot harder and riskier now.

My father wouldn’t understand. My mother is beginning to ask why my boyfriend and I so often say we’re going out to get a cup of coffee. We’re really going out so I can smoke.

My boyfriend is also tired of the lies, but doesn’t want my parents to think it’s his fault I started smoking. I am not ready to quit yet, so that would make confessing even harder. What should I do?

Bad Habit

Dear Bad: Your parents probably can smell the smoke on your hair and clothes, and over time, smokers can develop yellowing teeth and fingers, so you might not be hiding as much as you think. And quitting will become more difficult the longer you wait. That said, you are 18 years old and an adult. It’s time to face the music, honey. Good luck.

Dear Annie: When I was 16, the school nurse noticed I had high blood pressure, so my doctor ran some tests. He said high blood pressure can damage the kidneys and said mine were only working at about 50 percent capacity. He told me a transplant would be necessary in the future.

His words didn’t hit home until 13 years later, when my kidneys actually failed and I ended up on dialysis. Luckily for me, my cousin Darlene donated her kidney in March of 2000. Since then, I have a new appreciation for life. I learned about the biennial National Kidney Foundation U.S. Transplant Games — an Olympic-style event for transplant recipients of all ages. I won medals in track and field and helped lead my team to gold in volleyball in the past two Transplant Games events. This summer, I will travel to Madison, Wis., for the 2010 National Kidney Foundation U.S. Transplant Games, Friday through Aug. 4.

For more information, and to learn about organ donation, they can contact the National Kidney Foundation at 800-622-9010 or visit transplantgames.org

Holly Miyagawa, California

Dear Holly: We are happy to tell our readers about the transplant games and hope they will contact the National Kidney Foundation. We wish you the best of luck breaking your record from last year.

Dear Annie: This is for “Still Miss Him,” who didn’t want her mother to remarry after Dad died.

I had been married for 41 years when my husband passed away after a long illness. Eighteen months later, I met a widower who had been married 46 years. We were together for five years. I do not regret this relationship, as he gave me everything my first husband couldn’t. I will miss him forever.

Please tell that daughter to be happy for her mother. A second chance at life doesn’t always come around.

Life Is for the Living

E-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045.

Creators Syndicate