A man van ... Really?

A man van ... Really?

Chicago Tribune: Chrysler is getting ready to roll out a manly minivan. (Your one-liner goes here.) The carmaker isn’t talking, but The Wall Street Journal got the low-down from dealers who’d been briefed about the plan to splash testosterone on America’s favorite Mom Mobile, the Dodge Grand Caravan.

According to the WSJ, the “man van” will likely be based on a prototype displayed at the 2008 North American International Auto Show in Detroit. That model featured a hood scoop with an air vent over the engine, a macho orange exterior and black leather seats with red stitching. Suggested moniker: The Chrysler Viagra.

It won’t be an easy sell, especially against the resonant authenticity of Toyota’s “Swagger Wagon” campaign. Those ads — a suburban-square family’s hip-hop ode to its faithful Sienna — celebrate the essence of the minivan’s appeal: It’s all about cup holders and cargo space.

Soccer Mom market

The minivan’s soccer-mom niche is so pronounced that Chevrolet once underwrote a magazine, Kick, to serve as a vehicle for its ads.

We’ve never known anyone, man or woman, who reveled in driving a minivan, but that didn’t stop it from selling like gangbusters for 20 years, peaking at 1.4 million in 2000. The thing has room for a stroller, 12 bags of groceries and six kids who aren’t touching each other. So what if it looks like a lunchbox on wheels?

But judging from the Internet feedback, the man van is DOA, unless Chrysler somehow finds a way to make it look like a Camaro.

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