ANNIE’S MAILBOX: He’s trying to help, not hurt, 2 girls

August 13, 2010 at 4:12a.m.

By KATHY MITCHELL and MARCY SUGAR

Dear Annie: I am going to be in college soon, and I have two problems.

While acting as a service volunteer in a foreign country, I met “Anna” and became close to her and her family. Anna has kept in contact, writing me every day. But twice she has gotten upset when she thought I had a girlfriend. (I did not then and don’t now.) I am not trying to lead her on. I never made any promises. I do have feelings for her.

Then there is “Mia,” a close friend from high school. I care for her a lot, but she seems stuck in a rut with school and with a previous boyfriend who makes her unhappy. Mia knows how I feel and is OK dating and spending time with me, but there’s no commitment. I want to help her find herself. What can I do to help without hurting either of these two girls?

Concerned Admirer

Dear Prince Charming: Instead of being the girls’ hero, they treat you as a convenient way to get what they need. Tell Anna you cherish your friendship with her, but the distance makes any closer relationship impossible. Then wish Mia the best, and let her know you’ll be available if she ever gets over her old boyfriend. Stop being the consolation prize.

Dear Annie: Our home is five feet away from our neighbor’s fence. They have two dogs that use the cement pavement as their bathroom. There is a strong smell of urine coming from their property.

Is there a tactful way of asking them to hose off the cement walkway?

Bothered in California

Dear California: Try talking to your neighbors. Say nicely, “I’m sure you don’t realize that the pungent odor from your dogs penetrates my entire home. Would it be possible for you to hose down the walkway after they use it?” If they are considerate, they will be happy to do this. You also could check to see whether your county or state has a community mediation or dispute resolution center that handles such disagreements between neighbors.

Dear Annie: I was amused by “Dirty Dishes, Not Dirty Hands,” who objected to a friend washing up in his kitchen sink after playing golf.

I am curious: Before this family prepares food, do they go to the bathroom to wash their hands? After they prepare the hamburger patties for grilling, do they go back to the bathroom to clean up? And after they rinse off the raw chicken, do they go back to the bathroom to wash their hands? After they clean the counter to prepare the salad, do they go into the bathroom to rinse the cleanser off their fingers?

Do you see where I’m going with this? Raw-chicken residue and the miniscule bits of food left around the kitchen drain harbor as many if not more bacteria than grubby golf hands.

Clean Hands

Dear Clean: One needs to be cautious about germs, particularly those tracked in from outdoors, in areas where food is prepared. Enough said.

E-mail your questions to anniesmailboxcomcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045.

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