ANNIE’S MAILBOX: Vacation isn’t so great anymore

August 8, 2010 at 10:00a.m.

By KATHY MITCHELL and MARCY SUGAR

Dear Annie: For several summers, my family has overlapped vacation time with a nice couple we have known for many years. Now I’m not sure I want to keep seeing them.

Last year, the husband questioned why we go to church. I like going to Mass with my family. One evening, the four of us stayed up and talked, and I ended up having to defend my more traditional values against his anti-religious and very liberal views.

His first wife was a blonde, and his present wife is a brunette. My wife is a redhead. I’m beginning to think he has designs on her. My wife thinks my suspicions are crazy.

The problem is, my opinion on this annual vacation scenario has me coming in a distant fourth. What do you say?

Madness in Maine

Dear Maine: We say you are wildly overreacting. This man’s anti-religious and liberal viewpoints have nothing to do with your wife. Is he making a play for her? Does he try to get her alone? Does he call, text or visit her without your knowledge? If so, you have cause to worry. Otherwise, we don’t see it.

Discussions on religion and politics can engender extreme reactions. We strongly recommend you pick other subjects.

Dear Annie: My older sister has the annoying habit of copying my ideas on decorating and style and even my leisurely pursuits and passing them off as her own. This puts me in an awkward position when people compliment her on my ideas and assume I am the one copying her.

I would not mind if she’d give me credit when she is complimented. How do I handle this?

Middle-Aged Sister

Dear Sister: Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but it can be plenty irritating. Your sister obviously feels insecure about her own taste, which is why she copies yours. Offer to take her shopping, and help her select something that reflects her own style. And if she is complimented in front of you, it is perfectly OK to correct the misimpression, as long as you are polite. Say sweetly, “Yes, didn’t her family room turn out lovely? She used the same design I had in mine.”

Dear Annie: I read the letter from “Don’t Make Fun of Fat Children,” whose widowed uncle is raising two overweight boys. I think you may have missed a critical point. How long ago did the boys’ mother pass away?

My father died when I was 14. For weeks after, friends brought us food to comfort the mourners. Well, it comforted me a lot. I gained an enormous amount of weight and struggled with my weight until my early 60s.

After much effort, I have managed to maintain a fairly normal weight for the past eight years. Perhaps those boys would benefit from some enjoyable physical activity.

Kathy

Dear Kathy: You make a good point, and we hope the caring aunt who wrote will keep it in mind.

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