Cancer-clinic social worker offers pearls of wisdom

By Linda Linonis

Qualities observed in the waiting room taught a social worker about what’s important in life.

WARREN — Nancy M. Tamburro shared her understanding of the many ways people face cancer in her talk “All I Really Needed to Know I Learned from the Waiting Room” during the 20th annual Cancer Survivorship Day.

The Sunday afternoon event at Lincoln School, 2253 Atlantic St. N.E., was sponsored by Forum Health Trumbull Memorial Hospital and the TMH Foundation in partnership with the American Cancer Society.

“I learned about intimacy ... in the sense of telling another person about your deepest feelings,” Tamburro said. “As a social worker, I learned this from experience and not from a textbook.”

The licensed social worker at Ireland Cancer Center University Hospitals of Cleveland said her office is by the waiting room — and just by being in the vicinity, she learned a lot.

She realized the cancer patients worried about what “fear was doing to the people that they loved” and how they didn’t “want to interrupt family life.”

She added, “I don’t want to be dependent” is a phrase she said she heard often.

“I learned to be courageous as I watched people with a new diagnosis,” she said. The medical treatment, the physicians, the information added up to a surreal experience “but people gave their lives over to strangers. I learned what true intimacy is.”

Tamburro also shared that she watched many couples sit quietly, not saying a word.

“I witnessed the remarkable strength of the caregivers,” she said. “Being there is what is important.”

“I learned about persevering,” Tamburro said, as she watched people come and go for treatments. “We all take turns being in the lightness and darkness.”

Among the 150 in attendance was Matthew Ciminero of Warren, who was diagnosed with multiple myeloma in November 2005.

“I went in Thanksgiving Day because of a breathing problem, and they found pneumonia then cancer,” he said. “At first, they said I had two days to live then six months.”

Ciminero, 59 at the time, said his cancer of the blood in bone marrow seemed like a death sentence.

“But I wanted to live. ... I was on the verge of retiring,” said the wine salesman who worked in the Youngstown area.

He said he went to the Cleveland Clinic, where he received treatment including chemotherapy until Christmas of that year. He said he had many emotions — why, anger, fear — but he got past that.

“I knew I had to move on. I learned about the disease and what to expect,” he said, noting he would be taking medicine for the rest of his life and dealing with the side effects.

“The diagnosis gets you thinking about what really is important in life and what you want and want for others,” he said. “It is a great teacher. ... You learn about yourself.”

Arlene Boughner of Cortland, a three-month survivor of breast cancer, said she attended “to hear other people’s stories” and see that “they’re OK” now.

A 14-year survivor of breast cancer and nine-year survivor of colon cancer, Jo Wilson of Bristolville said her faith helped her face the disease. She is a member of Bristol Methodist Church.

“God took care of me and got me through the bad times,” she said. “I’m amazed at how many survivors there are. ... I will participate in the Relay for Life as long as I am able.”

Even after her second diagnosis, Wilson said, “What else can you do but accept it and deal with it?”

Julie Buckley of Sharon, Pa., had just turned 40 and hadn’t had her first mammogram yet when she did a self-exam and found a lump in her breast. She was diagnosed in May 2007. Because her sister is a nurse at Trumbull Memorial, she went there.

“I felt comfortable there,” she said. “I knew staying positive was important.”

Buckley said her daughter was her “inspiration to get better.”

She had radiation and chemo. Though she said she sometimes feel tired, “You go back to your life.”

The program also included a welcome by Robert G. Wolleben, executive vice president at Trumbull Memorial; remarks by Deb Anastasiadis, registered nurse and operations manager at Ireland Cancer Center at TMH; artist Mary Beth Wensel, who led participants in an art project; and musician Teddy Pantelas.

A butterfly release concluded the program, which noted that there are 11 million cancer survivors in the United States. That number is expected to grow to 20 million survivors by 2020 because of improved cancer detection and treatment methods.

Cancer Survivorship Day celebrates success in the ongoing battle against cancer.