43
Reverse holiday blues at church
For some, the joyful season of Christmas is tinged with sadness.
YOUNGSTOWN — Composer Irving Berlin dreamed of a “White Christmas,” and singer Bing Crosby crooned the tune into popularity. The lyrics allude to wonderful Christmases past and wish “... your days be merry and bright.”
But reality rarely matches the fantasy of a picture-perfect Christmas. A minor inconvenience such as lights on the tree burning out to a major issue such as a death in the family or job loss may evoke sad and hopeless feelings.
It might be a struggle to focus on Christmas as the joyful season of the birth of Jesus and remembering family and friends with gifts. Pressures and anxiety of life turn the dream of a white Christmas blue.
If you don’t feel much like “donning gay apparel,” and more like the Grinch stole your Christmas spirit, special services planned by three area churches will address feelings of sadness, loneliness and grief.
Tonight at 7, Liberty Presbyterian Church will have its second annual Blue Christmas service.
“It came about last year when a member talked about going through a sad/bad time,” said Kathryn Infante, a church elder. The elders and board of deacons conduct the service. “I think the need is greater than ever. We address the feelings of grief and loss.”
This year’s service was arranged by an interfaith committee representing Baptist, Catholic and Methodist traditions, she said.
Though the church is decorated for Christmas, Infante said for this service the altar will be stripped of linens and will be a stark setting with a tree branch. “That represents grief and sorrow,” she said.
She emphasized that the church sanctuary is a “place of safety.” The service will include Scripture and prayer. “People may express their feelings silently or aloud,” she said. “Whatever your comfort level is.”
The 40-minute service, she noted, will allow participants the chance to “step back and take a breath.” “We want people to lay their burdens at the foot of the cross,” she said.
The church also will distribute Bibles. People can go back and read some of the passages that will be included in the service, she said.
She said participants also may jot down what is bothering them on a slip of paper, which will be burned after the service. “Burning has been a symbolic sign of purification,” Infante said.
“We hope participants go away with hope,” Infante said. “As a church, it’s what we can offer.” She also pointed out that people will see that others share sad feelings at this season and that in itself often is a comfort.
Howland Community Church and New Waterford United Methodist Church will both have services at 7 p.m. Sunday, the winter solstice, the longest night of the year.
Pastor JoAnn Metzendorf, minister of education and families at Howland Community Church, said Christmas does have a curious mix of joyful and sad feelings. The church has had its Candle of Hope service for four or five years. “People may get depressed at this time of year,” she said. “Maybe life and situations aren’t turning out how they want or expect.”
Pastor Metzendorf said various factors make people “feel afraid and anxious.” The economy, worry about one’s job and finances and the global situation contribute to uneasy feelings, she said. “Christmas is supposed to be a happy time, but people often feel anxious,” she said.
She said the service will include an Advent wreath of remembrance. The four candles, representing the four Sundays of Advent, also will represent “love and loss, remembering the pain of loss of a job, relationship or health, remembering one’s self in good times and bad, and remembering one’s faith.
“I want people to know that God is with them no matter what ... in good times and bad times,” she said. “God surrounds people with peace and love.”
She noted the church picked the winter solstice day for the service because it represents the darkness people might be feeling. The minister also noted that people feel let down when Christmas isn’t perfect. “Families need to be more realistic and have more realistic expectations. Try to focus on the spiritual side,” she said.
The Rev. Mark Vincent, pastor of New Waterford UMC, said the service evolved because the church has experienced “significant deaths” among members, young and old, to cancer. “The blue service addresses the reality of pain in a worship environment,” he said.
He said Elvis Presley’s song “Blue Christmas” and feeling “down, blue and sad” is understood culturally. “The holiday is supposed to be festive,” he said, “but those who have lost a loved one are going from reality to hope.”
The Rev. Mr. Vincent described the service Sunday on the winter solstice as “the dark night of the soul.” He said the service will be more of a meditation and participants will gather in a circle around the altar. “God has Confidence in You” is the title of Mr. Vincent’s sermon in which he’ll discuss the reality of Job’s suffering.
“O Come, O Come, Emmanuel,” which focuses on hope, will be among carols sung, and candles will be lit.
“God is with us in the midst of suffering. He gives us hope in the here and now and in the future,” Mr. Vincent said.
linonis@vindy.com