Writing memoirs? Guide eases task

Storytelling is a powerful tool, the author says.

By SHERRI WINSTON

SOUTH FLORIDA SUN-SENTINEL

“How to Write Your Life Story” by Ralph Fletcher (HarperCollins, $15.99)

“How to Write Your Life Story” by Ralph Fletcher is designed to motivate young readers to become outstanding writers.

Even so, I found that this old reader learned a thing or two about the value of memoir writing and a way to use it within my family.

Fletcher’s deceptively poignant “how-to” guides us through the phases of autobiographical writing — taking us from awkward to elegant.

His goal isn’t to make every fifth- or sixth-grader in America a published author. What he strives for is to help young people understand the power of storytelling and the many valuable uses for keeping a family history.

If your kids have moved out and you can’t stand listening to the A/C kick on and off, maybe it’s time to go through your box of photos and remember the many wonderful little nuggets that have made your lives special.

Maybe it’s time to write some of that down.

Putting it to use

With my nephew, Stevie, heading off to play college football next fall, I’ve been struck by how much he’s like my brother and how much he and his 14-year-old brother don’t know about their dad. After reading Fletcher’s book, I’m thinking this Christmas, along with the ubiquitous $50 bill and clothing, I’ll fashion a short history of what it was like growing up with their father.

I guarantee you the stories I remember about my brother will vary greatly from any versions he’s shared with the boys. (I’ll bet he’s never told the boys about how he used to stuff a pillowcase into his shirt collar and pretend he was Underdog.)

But as I read Fletcher’s book, I realize that the thrill of family memoir writing comes from the variation of perspectives. With three to four years between me and each of my four siblings, when we talk about our “childhoods” we’re always amazed that we’re talking about growing up in the same house with the same people. The mom I remember hated bread and lived almost exclusively on chicken; Jennifer, 10 years my junior, says when she was a teen, our mom ate bread like crazy and had become almost a vegetarian. I find that hard to believe, but that’s Jennifer’s story and she’s sticking to it.

Getting started

Fletcher says we need not be famous or have lived particularly daring lives to be worthy of writing our memoirs. When it comes to getting started, Fletcher suggests brainstorming your ideas, collecting family stories from relatives of different generations and gathering artifacts from your life. My college scrapbook from my senior year is filled with photos from football games at Spartan Stadium; ticket stubs from Prince’s “Purple Rain” tour and photos of me on the dorm softball team. My daughter, Lauren, has gone through that book at least a half-dozen times and asked for the story behind each photo, each memento.

My favorite chapter in the book, and the one I found most helpful, asks my favorite question: “Why?”

Why are you writing the story? Why should your audience care?

Fletcher writes: “With memoir or autobiography, however, it’s not enough just to tell a good story. With this kind of writing readers will wonder, Why did the writer include this? What’s the point? When you’re writing your life story, readers expect that you communicate why this event is important, what it says about you as a person and your life as a whole.”

My memoir will include a heaping dose of exaggeration. My family wants more than the facts — they want the facts with gravy on top. “How to Write Your Life Story” could be the perfect project to help you and your children bond and put your lives into perspective.