Parents of pupils with special needs come together
The parents help one another with support and advice.
MECHANICSBURG, Pa. (AP) — Mary Beth and David Simonic clung to each other through the hazy hours after their baby boy was born, groping for meaning in doctors’ vague references to genetic material and chromosome maps.
They knew baby Theodore had a rare condition mostly seen in babies who didn’t make it to birth. But doctors knew little more about his Trisomy 15 than his bewildered parents.
By the time their child was a toddler, the Simonics had come to terms and were charmed by Teddy.
He would always need more time, more patience and special care. His chromosomal disorder slows his physical and mental development. But Mary Beth Simonic, a Spanish teacher, and David Simonic, an independent mortgage lender, learned how to give their son what he needed.
Then Teddy started kindergarten at their Pittsburgh-area school district, and their hard-won knowledge seemed almost worthless.
Mary Beth Simonic told her story to members of a new parent group in the Mechanicsburg Area School District, where her son is in high school.
“I remember a five-hour [individual education plan] meeting and fighting the school for services and them fighting with us,” Mary Beth Simonic said.
Experts told her Teddy needed special therapy. School officials agreed but said it cost too much. She was at her breaking point.
Other parents in the group said they’d been there, too.
Having a child with learning disabilities means contending with therapists, doctors, special equipment, diets, medicine and schedules. And endlessly explaining the child’s special needs.
Then school comes into the picture. With that, there are individual education plan meetings, special buses, forms for school nurses, questions and sometimes impatience from teachers, and looks and sometimes teasing from classmates.
The extra anguish is driving some midstate parents of special-education pupils to form support groups, some on their own, some with schools.
Schools don’t have to give extra support to parents of pupils with disabilities. But Mary Beth Simonic said doing so goes a long way toward closing what can be a contentious divide.
Mechanicsburg began its group last summer after a routine survey of district parents showed that special-education parents felt isolated, said Bill Snyder, a supervisor of elementary special education.
Carlisle is considering a program for next year. The Central Dauphin School District last month began reserving a conference room for a group started by two mothers of pupils with learning disabilities.
In Mechanicsburg, behavior specialists Jessica Cable and Tracey Smiley met with parents in September. They gave tips on triggers and solutions for challenging behaviors. This month, speakers will discuss developing individual education plans, an often stressful process.
Schools must, under federal and state laws, supply the special teaching plans, which are developed by teams of parents, teachers and medical experts.
Mary Beth Simonic has sat on both sides of the table in education plan meetings. As a teacher, she’s fielded parent requests that she said reflected legitimate concerns but unreasonable demands on schools. “For instance, I would never ask to have Teddy in a regular chemistry class. He would be with his peers, but he would not be learning,” she said.
Her son will never balance molecular equations, but he’s a dancer, a fire company volunteer, a race-car fanatic and an extrovert, his mother said.
Sharing those successes with other parents of special-education pupils is easing feelings of alienation, she said.
That’s the idea, Snyder said.
“We’re hoping that we’re meeting some needs with parents. We’re hoping that [the group] builds momentum,” he said.