Money and fame are not everything

By JEFF HERRING

MCCLATCHY NEWSPAPERS

Perhaps I am a little behind the times, but it still sort of grabbed my attention when I found myself in WalMart the day after Halloween and noticed Christmas wreaths on every checkout register.

And speaking of being behind the times, although I’ve been to lots of jazz concerts as an adult, the last time I went to a “rock concert” we held up lighters and waved them with the music. So it was a kick, and for some reason I could not stop grinning, when I took my 13-year-old son to see Switchfoot, his favorite group, and we all waved our lighted cell phones with the music.

And speaking of music and changes, my graduate school roommate recently told me about his 14-year-old daughter looking at some of his old albums and saying “Awesome, Dad, these have music on both sides.”

With another holiday season upon us, I notice there seem to be two kinds of folks in the world — the complainers and the appreciators. I tend to avoid the complainers and appreciate the appreciators.

If you are in a relationship, here are 2 things you can do today:

1. Appreciate that you have a relationship, and 2. Tell the person you are with at least one thing you appreciate about them.

If you are looking for a relationship, you are not likely to find one sitting at home every night watching other people’s lives on television.

Great animation

Have you been to a kids movie lately? The animation is so great that I have to keep reminding myself that the creatures I am watching are not real.

If you are currently discussing your family holiday visiting plans, remember that your only true obligation is to create great memories for the family you have now.

A scene recently described to me — A car with dad and mom in the front seat, happily smoking away on their cigarettes while the two kids bicker and scream in the back seat. A kid in the school bus next to them gives them a creatively vulgar hand gesture. The parents roll down their window and scream at the bus driver about the kid on the bus being a bad example to their children. How’s that again?

As we watch all these young celebrities noisily implode before our eyes, it might just dawn on us that money and fame are not everything.

X Jeff Herring is a marriage and family therapist. Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services. For more tips and tools for you and your relationships, visit http://www.SecretsofGreat-Relationships.com.