Free mental-health service available to military families

Dear Annie: I'm writing because, as a Marine wife, I know the toll deployment and war can take on a family. When we were married 30 years ago, my husband and I were both in active duty. I soon separated from the Navy to raise our family of four children.
My husband was deployed in the first Gulf War. It wasn't until years later, about the time he was considering retirement, that he started to experience persistent health problems that needed more than routine medical care. The years since the war had exacted a price not only physically, but psychologically as well.
We slowly started to unravel as a family. Even while my husband began to get the treatment he needed, I knew I needed help as well. I made an appointment with a mental health counselor at our medical facility. I needed to learn that it wasn't being selfish to be able to put myself first in order to be a caregiver for others.
I've recently learned of a new service that allows military service members and their families to take a free mental health self-assessment. Available at www.MilitaryMentalHealth.org and by phone at (877) 877-3647, it helps you think about your symptoms and connects you with military and veterans' treatment resources. I wish this program had been there when I needed it. I know I would have seen the need for getting help much sooner.
I hope other military spouses or family members reading this will learn from my story and take advantage of this free service. A self-assessment is a first step toward supporting one another and a huge leap to ensuring your own personal health. A Marine's Wife in Virginia
Dear Virginia: Thank you for passing along this wonderful information. We hope active military members, as well as veterans and their families, will check this Web site and take the screening. It is completely confidential and can point you in the right direction if you need help.
Dear Annie: I am a 14-year-old girl, and my grandfather has macular degeneration. He is almost totally blind and extremely stubborn. My grandparents are both in their 70s, and I'm often at their house, helping with chores.
My grandfather was an airplane mechanic in the Army and still likes to tinker with his truck, even though he cannot drive anymore. I'm really afraid something is going to happen if someone is not helping him. I feel I should be the one out there with him, but I'm not sure how to approach him and ask because I don't want him to feel helpless or somehow degraded by needing constant help. Should I just back off and wait until he asks for my assistance? Caring Granddaughter
Dear Caring: What a wonderful, loving granddaughter you are. We recommend you take a sudden interest in truck engines and ask Grandpa to teach you about them. Next time he is tinkering, ask him how one of the truck parts works. You will make Grandpa feel useful, and you will learn something.
Dear Annie: I'm writing about "Lady in Waiting," who complained about doctors making patients wait.
I am a mother with a great pediatrician. While we sometimes have to wait, when it is our turn, we have his undivided attention. Even if the appointment is for one child, he always takes the time to peek at my other two. He talks to each of them and makes them feel like the most important person in the world.
We moved four cities away, but when a child is sick, it's worth the one- hour drive to see this doctor. "Lady" needs to stop complaining, take something to do while waiting, and make some extra time in her day for doctor visits. Thanks for letting me vent, and brag, because I Love My Doctor and Never Mind Waiting
Dear Never Mind: You should cut this out and give it to your pediatrician. It's quite a testament to his skills and charisma.
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