Words of wisdom offered for Mother's Day

Sunday is my first Mother's Day without my mother. She died in February at age 93.
What could I briefly say about her that might have meaning for others? Are there words of wisdom I could share to encourage you to think anew about your mother?
I offer the following for your consideration:
Words of wisdom No. 1: Shel Silverstein's "The Giving Tree" is a story about a young boy who comes to an apple tree for help, and each time the tree gives of herself -- her apples, her branches and her trunk. In the end, he returns to what is now only a stump to rest and ponder his fate.
If you haven't read "The Giving Tree," go to www.banned-width.com/shel/works/giving.html.
What are we to learn from the story? Each person takes away a different meaning.
Some say it's a parable about self-giving love or about life's inevitable and sad journey from childhood to adulthood.
Others see it as a morality tale about male chauvinism or environmental egocentrism.
What it means to me
For me, the story recalls my mother's giving ways. In her last days, she was no longer the strong tree that stood proud.
ather, she was the quiet but reassuring presence whose gifts of love and caring were still abundant.
What does Silverstein's story mean to you? Are you receiving more from your mother than you're giving back? Are you remembering what might have been? Can you give thanks for all that she's done for you and what you've done for her?
Words of wisdom No. 2: Anyone serious about writing is familiar with William Zinsser's classic work, "On Writing Well." HarperCollins released the 30th-anniversary edition of it this week.
Zinsser, a noted author, editor and teacher, wrote the following: "One of the saddest sentences I know is: 'I wish I had asked my mother about that."'
Some regrets
Since my mother's death, I've had my regrets. I wish I had asked Mom more about her growing-up years in St. Louis.
Her father died when she was 16, the oldest of three children. Was her father's absence a wound that never healed?
She was offered a full scholarship to Washington University in St. Louis after high school but turned it down to earn money and then marry. If she had gone to college, what career would she have pursued?
Zinsser reminds us to ask the questions and listen to the stories of our mothers (and fathers) before it's too late.
Words of wisdom No. 3: "For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother" (Matthew 12:50).
The Scriptural reference may seem odd, but it hints at the role of mothers (and fathers) that extends beyond familial bonds. Families are models of the relationship God has with humanity.
In our relationship with mother, father and siblings, we learn about self-giving love, kindness, patience and forgiveness -- the very qualities of God.
What our failures as families and our dysfunctional behavior point out is our need for those God-given virtues -- and ultimately our need for God.
A solid foundation
A mother who teaches her children about a loving and caring God provides a solid foundation for her child's growth.
My mother gave us a foundation for faith. It was her greatest gift to me and my two sisters. But it was only a foundation; each of us is responsible for how faith takes shape. And how we pass it on.
Was my mother perfect? Of course not. No one's is, despite all the "ode to my mother" tributes that idealize motherhood.
Sadly, those tributes are often guilt trips that too many mothers must endure. (If you haven't read Carla Barnhill's "The Myth of the Perfect Mother," put it on your list.)
The fact is, memories of our mothers are tinged with joy and pain, sometimes one more than the other.
Regardless of our upbringing, each of us has learned something valuable from our mothers that has shaped our lives.
For Mother's Day, I urge you to remember those lessons and consider whatever wise words that apply.
Our mothers, after all, are with us for a relatively short time.
Knight Ridder Newspapers