KATHY MITCHELL AND MARCY SUGAR \ Annie's Mailbox Tell wife that trust has been lost in her

Dear Annie: I am a 52-year-old male who has been married for 27 years. I have always tried to be a good husband and father. Last summer at a family reunion, one of my wife's old high school boyfriends showed up. They quickly hit it off and spent most of the afternoon talking about old times. It didn't bother me because I always have trusted my wife.
Recently, however, she has started acting more secretive, and I have caught her lying about certain things. In particular, she took a "mental health" day off. That evening, I went to get something out of her car, and saw that she had put more than 200 miles on the odometer. I asked about it, and she admitted she had traveled to a mall, and I know it's close to where her old boyfriend lives.
Now my wife wants to go away for a weekend alone "to think." She says I am smothering her. However, several days ago, I noticed she had visited a Web site about a motorcycle show. She has absolutely no interest in motorcycles -- but her old boyfriend does. I saw that for her weekend away, she booked reservations at the hotel where there is going to be a huge three-day motorcycle show.
What am I to think except that she is going to spend the weekend with him? Should I confront her? I have asked her to see a marriage counselor with me, but she is adamant about not wanting to do this. I am tempted to go to the show and, if they are together, tell her that our marriage is over. Dazed and Confused
Dear Dazed: This is too important to play hide and seek. Tell your wife what you have discovered and ask if she wants to save your marriage, because you have lost your trust in her. It's quite likely that after 27 years of marriage, she believes an old high school boyfriend will make her feel young and exciting again. But she may not fully understand what she's risking. Remind her.
Dear Annie: I recently started working in a pediatric office. I am horrified by some of the names these parents give their children. A 16-year-old single mother just named her baby "Pretty."
Don't these parents realize the cruelty they are subjecting their children to, not only in childhood, but for the rest of their lives? When I write to you, I say, "Dear Annie." But I doubt I would have any respect for a columnist named "Dear Cupcake." Such frivolous names compromise credibility and may hinder success.
I think kids these days have a hard enough time growing up without having to defend their names. What do you say? Jane Smith
Dear Jane: We agree that some names give children fits and don't improve with age. However, in the past several years, there has been an increase in the number of children with unusual names, which in turn, means it isn't so odd to have one. Gwyneth Paltrow has a daughter named "Apple," and Jason Lee named his son "Pilot Inspektor." It almost makes us pine for "Moon Unit Zappa." Such names are distinctive, which is the point the parents are trying to make. If parents also make the child feel special and loved, the name won't hurt them -- and if they truly can't stand it, they can always change it later.
Dear Annie: I read the letter from "Concerned, but Not Dissatisfied," who said she and her husband are in their 70s, married 50 years, and enjoy sex three times a week. My wife and I are in our 70s. For heaven's sake, please publish their diet. Paul
Dear Paul: You weren't the only reader who asked for the secret to their successful sex life. Whatever it is, they should bottle it.
XE-mail your questions to anniesmailbox@com-cast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox™, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611.
Creators Syndicate
Copyright 2006 Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.