Children of multiple marriages have troubles

Dear Annie: I have two adult children from my first marriage, "Jon" and "Christine." I remarried 15 years ago and have a young child from this marriage.
During the first few years of my second marriage, my older children were very involved in my life, although my relationship with Christine was somewhat strained, especially after the birth of my daughter. However, Christine would still come to family events. That all changed when Jon became a father. After this, Christine would have virtually nothing to do with her half-sister. In fact, at one occasion, when my daughter went to hug Christine, she pushed her away.
This situation has deteriorated to the point where I barely speak to Christine, and Jon also has distanced himself from me. Their behavior toward my young daughter has alienated my wife so much that she won't have anything to do with them, nor does she want me to have a relationship with them, either.
I love my wife and feel terrible about how my older children are treating their half-sibling. How can I mend fences? Stressed in Connecticut
Dear Stressed: Your children are still punishing you for remarrying and having another child. They feel displaced, and to some extent, they have been. Your wife's attitude, while understandable, is not helping. These fractured relationships can take a long time to mend, and it is important that you not give up. Please continue to stay in touch with Christine and Jon, and invite them to your family events. We hope they will come around, but at least your conduct will give you nothing to regret.
Dear Annie: As a faithful reader of your column, I am hoping you can settle a silly dispute between my husband and me.
What are the proper names for the three major meals -- or more specifically, when exactly is dinner? I always have known them as being breakfast, lunch and supper, or sometimes dinner. To me, dinner is at night. You have dinner dates, dinner and a movie, go out for dinner, etc., all of which take place at night. My husband insists I am wrong. He says dinner is at noon, supper is in the evening. I think "breakfast, dinner and supper" sounds funny.
We heckle each other about this all the time. Please solve our disagreement and put an end to this once and for all. Wife (and Hubby) in Columbus, Neb.
Dear Wife (and Hubby): You can stop arguing -- you both are right. In most parts of the U.S., "supper" and "dinner" are used interchangeably and mean the meal served sometime between 4 and 9 p.m. However, there are regional differences where "dinner" is a big meal served in the middle of the day and "supper" is a lighter meal served in the late evening. Your husband may have grown up in a part of the country where those were the customary terms, so it's time to find something else to fight about.
Dear Annie: I read the letter from "Bewildered in Illinois," whose 62-year-old husband, "Frank," developed prostatitis and stopped having sex. Instead, he is looking at porn every morning and has brought the dog into their bed.
The frequency of his visiting these sites, along with his belittling behavior, sounds like Frank may have a sexual addiction to pornography. In addition to your suggestion that she see a counselor, she should check out COSA (cosa-recovery.org), P.O. Box 14537, Minneapolis, MN 55414, and S-Anon (sanon.org) at (800) 210-8141. Both are 12-step recovery programs for those whose lives have been affected by another person's compulsive sexual behavior. Been There
Dear Been There: You may be right, and we hope she will check out both of those organizations for spouses of porn and sex addicts.
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