Letters may be gone, but message remains
Dear Annie: I used to work at the World Trade Center. My favorite times were during the Christmas season. The entire plaza would come alive with festivities and goodwill. The year before 9/11, my office was loaded with gifts being hidden until Christmas Eve. All of us, from all faiths, looked forward to the annual Christmas party where we let our hair down for a night of laughter and excitement.
We worked hard in the city. Sometimes, we didn't leave the office until 9 p.m., when all was quiet and dark, and the cold wind blew across the plaza floor. Before 9/11, there were these huge white block letters in the plaza that spelled "PEACE ON EARTH." I never knew how the letters got there or who put them there. They were like a smile greeting me in the morning and wishing me a good night.
I did not know it would be the last Christmas I would see them. What happened to these letters of hope? I sure would like to see them again. D.C. in Beacon, N.Y.
Dear D.C.: We contacted Pasquale DiFulco, spokesperson for the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey, and discovered that those letters were stored in the World Trade Center.
Here is his reply: "The letters were destroyed on 9/11, but the message of hope that they conveyed remains as vibrant as ever. As we celebrate the holidays this time of year with family and friends, it is the perfect occasion to remember the spirit of that message and do what we can, each in our own way and together as one, to work toward peace on earth."
Dear Annie: My co-worker, "Ed," likes to engage anyone who will listen in "discussion." However, if you don't agree immediately with his viewpoint, it quickly escalates into an argument. Ed loses control, becomes extremely loud, and his face turns bright red. At this point, most people choose to end the "discussion," which Ed interprets to mean he has lost the argument. He then complains that he can never win a debate, since everyone is so close-minded and they interrupt him and talk over him, which, in actuality, is exactly what he does.
Any suggestion how to deal with this man? He is an otherwise valuable employee. Ed's Co-worker
Dear Co-worker: Poor Ed. He's so insecure he has to feel superior to everyone. We don't understand why you and your co-workers continue to engage in these "discussions" when you know the outcome won't be pretty.
Unless Ed's superiors tell him the rants must stop, it's best if you learn how to deal with him as he is. When he starts up, nod and say, "You may have a point," and then make it clear you are too busy to stay and chat. What do you care if he thinks the entire office is close-minded? If you do not become involved in his arguments, he will not be able to respond in his usual inappropriate way. Disengage.
Dear Annie: I read the letter from "Worried Mom," whose daughter's 12- year-old friend, "Amanda," sleeps over often, but her mom never picks her up. Amanda preferred to run around the neighborhood, and her mother didn't care. As a foster parent for 29 years, that sent up alarm bells.
"Worried" should ask Amanda why she doesn't want to go home, or why her mom doesn't care to have her there. Many of the abused children who come through our home have said that they would have told someone the truth about the horrors happening in their families if only someone had asked the right questions.
We need to be safe havens for children and not ignore warning signs that something is not right. Foster Mom in Santa Cruz, Calif.
Dear Santa Cruz: Thank you for a valuable reminder that it does indeed take a village to raise a child. Parents, please "ask the right questions." These children need you.
E-mail your questions to anniesmailbox@com-cast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox™, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611.
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