NEW THIS WEEK

NEW THIS WEEK
'SHREK 2'
ssss Not-so-jolly green ogre Shrek (Mike Myers) must meet the in-laws (John Cleese and Julie Andrews) before he and Princess Fiona (Cameron Diaz) can live happily ever after. This sweet, immensely gratifying follow-up to 2001's instant classic is every bit as laugh-out-loud funny and tirelessly inventive as its predecessor, and the eye-popping, nearly three-dimensional computer animation is nothing short of breathtaking. The world is a better place with "Shrek 2" in it -- and how many other movies can you say that about? (PG-13) for some crude humor, a brief substance reference and some suggestive content; Austintown Commons 10, Boulevard Centre, Cinema South, Elm Road Drive-In, Hermitage, Westgate.
LAST WEEK'S TOP 10
'BREAKIN' ALL THE RULES'
ss When it comes to comedy, this film breaks far too few rules. As Jamie Foxx and Gabrielle Union careen toward their inevitable love match, we're forced to wring laughs from clich & eacute;d conventions such as an amorous senior citizen and the exploits of a thirsty dog. And rather than leap from the screen, their chemistry requires a leap of the imagination that no amount of swelling music or slow-motion camera work can manufacture. The sad thing is, Foxx can be entertaining in both comedic and dramatic roles. So the lack of laughs or passion here should be blamed on writer-director Daniel Taplitz, who had plenty to work with -- especially in Union, who would have had a substantial starring role by now if such a thing existed for black women not named Halle Berry. (PG-13) for sexual material/humor and language; at Boulevard Centre, Cinema South. (Review by Associated Press)
'ENVY'
s 1/2 Jack Black and Ben Stiller's friendship is upended when Black's crackpot invention to vaporize dog poo is a raging success and turns him into an overnight millionaire. Considering the talent in front of and behind the camera (it was directed by "Rainman" Oscar-winner Barry Levinson and co-produced by "Curb Your Enthusiasm"-"Seinfeld" genius Larry David), this labored, laugh-deficient farce should have been a whole lot funnier. No wonder it sat on the shelf for more than a year. (PG-13) for language and crude humor; at Elm Road Drive-In, Tinseltown.
'LAWS OF ATTRACTION'
ss1/2 As high-profile Manhattan divorce lawyers, Julianne Moore and Pierce Brosnan make a nifty, impossibly glamorous couple in this curiously retro, yet still modestly charming, battle-of-the-sexes romp from director Peter Howitt ("Sliding Doors"). Whether trading affectionate barbs or finally owning up to the fact that they're truly meant for each other, Moore (endearingly starchy) and Brosnan (all rumpled roguishness) light up the screen with old-fashioned movie-star charisma. Who cares if there's nothing in the script you won't see coming a mile away? Like confectioners' sugar that's been left out in the rain, it leaves a gooey-sweet puddle in its wake. (PG-13) for sexual content and language; at Cinema South, Hermitage.
'MAN ON FIRE'
ssss Denzel Washington ratchets up his usual intensity to near-operatic proportions as a bodyguard who single-handedly destroys a good chunk of Mexico City -- and much of its citizenry -- after his 9-year-old charge (Dakota Fanning from "I Am Sam") gets kidnapped. Director Tony Scott ("Crimson Tide," "Enemy of the State") gives this standard vigilante yarn the weight and heft of a true action epic, and the screenplay piles on layers upon layers of psychological nuance and deft plot twists. (R) for language and strong violence; at Austintown Commons 10, Boulevard Centre, Cinema South, Westgate.
'MEAN GIRLS'
sss1/2 Based on the best-selling book "Queen Bees and Wannabes," this reteaming of "Freaky Friday" director Mark Waters and tweener fave-rave Lindsay Lohan is such a smart and sassy teen comedy that it's good enough to be mentioned in the same breath as John Hughes and Molly Ringwald's 1984 young-adult classic, "Sixteen Candles." Lohan plays a home-schooled 16-year-old whose first brush with public education brings her face to face with all the cliques, hierarchies and unwritten social rules of a suburban high school. (PG-13) for sexual content, language and some teen partying; at Austintown Commons 10, Boulevard Centre, Hermitage, Tinseltown, Westgate.
'NEW YORK MINUTE'
s Those annoying Olsen twins play 17-year-old sisters (Ashley's an Oxford-bound honor student; Mary-Kate's a wannabe rocker) who spend one very eventful day in Manhattan. The great Eugene Levy is wasted as an overzealous truant officer; Jared Padalecki (Dean from "The Gilmore Girls") plays somebody's love interest; and the icky, overexposed Jack Osbourne has a mercifully brief cameo as M-K's band manager. Come back, Hilary Duff. All is forgiven. (PG) for mild sensuality and thematic elements; at Austintown Commons 10, Boulevard Centre, Hermitage, Tinseltown, Westgate.
'13 GOING ON 30'
ss1/2 A smart but nerdy 13-year-old girl's wish to become "30 and flirty and thriving" is granted overnight in this pleasant, if hardly spring-fresh, contemporary fable. As the tweener trapped inside a glamorous New York magazine editor's body, "Alias" star Jennifer Garner slightly overdoes the character's wide-eyed innocence, but she's got the charm and spunkiness of a future romantic-comedy superstar. (PG-13) for some sexual content and brief drug references; at Austintown Commons 10, Boulevard Centre, Tinseltown, Westgate.
'TROY'
sss1/2 Loosely based on Homer's "The Iliad," director Wolfgang Petersen's suitably brawny action-adventure is steeped in heroic grandeur and so magnificently appointed that 1200 B.C. comes alive onscreen as never before. Petersen serves up epic-scaled, state-of-the-art battle scenes; parades more beefcake than an Outback steakhouse; and enlists the services of better actors (including Eric Bana, Brendan Gleeson, Brian Cox and a magnificently ravaged Peter O'Toole) than we're accustomed to seeing in sword-and-sandals flicks. As Greek soldier extraordinaire Achilles, the newly buffed Brad Pitt's physical perfection is fetishized to such an extent that it could make some red-blooded American lads a tad, er, uneasy. (R) for graphic violence and sexuality/nudity; at Austintown Commons 10, Boulevard Centre, Cinema South, Hermitage, Westgate.
'VAN HELSING'
s1/2 During the late 19th century, Dr. Van Helsing (Hugh Jackman channeling his Wolverine persona from the "X-Men" movies) heads to Transylvania to battle Count Dracula, the Wolf Man and Frankenstein's Monster. Aiding and abetting him is glamorous Anna (Kate Beckinsale) whose family is dedicated to ridding the world of vampires. Overproduced, half-baked, and ultimately wearying, this state-of-the-art special-effects extravaganza straddles a fine line between entertainment and exhaustion for two noisy hours before finally succumbing to CGI fatigue. (PG-13) for nonstop creature action violence, frightening images and sensuality; at Elm Road Drive-in, Tinseltown, Austintown Commons 10, Boulevard Centre, Hermitage, Westgate.
ALSO PLAYING
'BARBERSHOP 2:BACK IN BUSINESS'
sss Virtually the entire cast of Ice Cube's 2002 sleeper has been reunited, and it's once again in a charmingly cantankerous mood. When a greedy real-estate developer starts gobbling up all the property on Chicago's South Side, Calvin Palmer's barbershop crew teams up to fight fire with fire. (PG-13) for language, sexual material and brief drug references; at Cinemark.
'BOBBY JONES: STROKE OF GENIUS'
ss Earnest and plodding inspirational biopic about 1920s golf legend Bobby Jones (Jim Caviezel, last seen as Jesus in "The Passion of the Christ") who died of syringomyelia, a disease of the spinal cord. Although handsomely produced and certainly well-meaning, pedestrian direction and a connect-the-dots screenplay can't make plaster saint Jones a compelling or even remotely interesting protagonist. It feels like a middling made-for-cable flick that somehow managed to garner a theatrical release. (PG) for mild profanity; Austintown Movies 3.
'CONNIE AND CARLA'
ss Nia Vardalos (who also scripted) and Toni Collette play Chicago showbiz wannabes whose lives take an, er, unusual turn after they witness their boss getting iced by some hoodlums. On the lam from the mob, the brassy broads pass themselves off as drag queens and, quicker than you can say "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy," become the toast of the town at a West Hollywood nightclub. (PG-13) for thematic elements, sexual humor and drug references; at Austintown Movies 3.
'DAWN OF THE DEAD'
ss 1/2 A serviceable remake of the 1979 George A. Romero drive-in classic in which survivors of a worldwide plague (including Sarah Polley and Ving Rhames) are forced to battle flesh-eating zombies in a suburban shopping mall. (R) for pervasive strong horror violence and gore, language and sexuality; at Cinemark.
'ETERNAL SUNSHINEOF THE SPOTLESS MIND'
sss 1/2 Another of the boldly experimental, virtually uncategorizable excursions by Charlie Kaufman ("Being John Malkovich," "Adaptation") into the rabbit hole of his boundless imagination. Jim Carrey plays a jilted lover who undergoes an experimental procedure to have memories of his ex (Kate Winslet) wiped clean from his noggin. (R) for language, some drug and sexual content; at Austintown Movies 3.
'50 FIRST DATES'
sss Reunited onscreen for the first time since 1998's "The Wedding Singer," Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore make a cute screwball couple in this unexpectedly heartfelt, deeply affecting "Groundhog Day"-like romantic comedy. Since Barrymore's character suffers from a rare neurological disorder that causes her memory to be erased each night, Sandler has to make her fall in love with him every time they meet. The second-act shift to more dramatic concerns is deftly handled; less satisfying is the rowdy frat-house humor supplied by longtime Sandler cohort, Rob Schneider. (PG-13) for crude sexual humor and drug references; Cinemark.
'THE GIRL NEXT DOOR'
sss Emile Hirsch plays Matthew, a high school honor student whose college plans are temporarily derailed when former porn starlet Danielle (Elisha Cuthbert from "24") moves in next door and takes a shine to him. Everything is sunshine and lollipops until Danielle's sleazy ex-boyfriend (Timothy Olyphant) shows up and starts playing mind games with the naive Matthew. (R) for strong sexual content, language and some drug-alcohol use; at Cinemark.
'GOODBYE, LENIN!'
sss1/2 A captivating and immensely pleasurable post-Cold War comedy about how the 1989 reunification of Germany affected one Eastern bloc family. When his dedicated Communist mom awakens after an eight-month-long coma, Alex (Daniel Bruehl, cute enough to be a star on the WB) perpetrates a hoax of epic proportions to prevent her from discovering that the Berlin Wall has fallen. Director Wolfgang Becker infuses his high-concept premise with such a benevolent, warmhearted spirit that the laughs practically topple over one another. (R) for brief language and sexual content; at Austintown Movies 3.
'HELLBOY'
sss1/2 You don't have to be a comic-book geek to appreciate director Guillermo Del Toro's lollapalooza of a fanboy fantasy based on Mike Mignola's cultish Dark Horse series. Working out of the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense headquarters in Newark, N.J., Hellboy (Ron Perlman) and pyrokinetic Liz Sherman (Selma Blair) must battle some oversize beasties unleashed through a Hell-Hole Generator by the diabolical Rasputin. (PG-13) for sci-fi action violence and frightening images; at Elm Road Drive-In.
'INTERMISSION'
ssss First-time director John Crowley's boisterous Dublin-set ensemble piece references everyone from Robert Altman and Quentin Tarantino to Mike Leigh and Danny Boyle, yet still remains a complete original. As a vicious hooligan who's planning a bank job with some down-on-their-luck cronies, Colin Farrell is frighteningly effective. (R) for pervasive language, some sexual content and violence; at Austintown Movies 3.
'JOHNSON FAMILY VACATION'
s Although clearly intended to be a Def-Jam answer to Chevy Chase's National Lampoon vacation flicks, this loud, ugly, laugh-deficient misfire plays like a failed UPN sitcom pilot instead. Cedric the Entertainer is a stressed-out LA insurance agent who drives his obnoxious brood (including Vanessa Williams, Bow Wow and Solange Knowles) cross-country to a family reunion in Caruthersville, Mo. So bad that it makes the worst entry in the Chase series ("European Vacation") look like the best ("Christmas Vacation") by default. (PG-13) for some sexual references, crude humor and brief drug use; at Cinemark.
'SCOOBY-DOO 2:MONSTERS UNLEASHED'
s More criminally stupid piffle based on the old Hanna-Barbera Saturday-morning cartoon show. (PG) for rude humor, language and some scary action; at Tinseltown.
'SECRET WINDOW'
ss1/2 The brilliant Johnny Depp plays Mort Rainey, a successful New York author who sequesters himself in a remote cabin to help deal with a nasty case of writer's block and his messy divorce. Compounding Mort's profound funk is a mysterious, possibly deranged dairy farmer named Shooter (John Turturro) who shows up one day and accuses him of plagiarizing a story. (PG-13) for violence-terror, sexual content and language; at Cinemark.
'TAKING LIVES'
ss This umpteenth variation on "Silence of the Lambs" casts Angelina Jolie as an FBI profiler summoned by French Canadian police to help ensnare a wily serial killer who, & agrave; la "The Talented Mr. Ripley," assumes the lives and identities of his victims. (R) for strong violence, including disturbing images, language and some sexuality; at Cinemark.
'WALKING TALL'
ss This cartoonishly violent action flick -- an "in-name-only" remake of the memorably seamy 1973 B-movie starring Joe Don Baker and Youngstowner Elizabeth Hartman -- marks a further steppingstone in The Rock's coronation as the next Arnold Schwarzenegger. (PG-13) for sequences of intense violence, sexual content, drug material and language; at Cinemark, Elm Road Drive-In.
XReviews by Vindicator correspondent Milan Paurich unless otherwise noted.