DEBORA SHAULIS | On the scene Strip away all the furor over Janet, and what's left? A lousy halftime

And it was such a good game.
The Super Bowl is on that dwindling list of activities we call national pastimes -- the things that inspire lunchtime conversation with co-workers and impromptu discussions with strangers while we wait in lines at grocery stores or post offices.
Now we're a nation divided over whether Janet Jackson's right breast and her hood ornament of a piercing belong on prime-time TV. While FCC chairman Michael Powell, NFL commissioner Paul Tagliabue, politicians and parents pile on the criticism over the now-infamous halftime show, TiVo has experienced a surge in its replay service, and Internet search engine Lycos reported Wednesday that Janet's "wardrobe malfunction" has generated as many Web searches as the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks.
Thankfully, we're united in assessing the sum of Sunday's midgame festivities. If there's a theme to comments I've heard, it's this:
"That was the lousiest blankety-blank halftime show I've ever seen."
The lineup
Obviously wanting to be hip, CBS turned to its Viacom family cousin, MTV, for entertainment help. MTV rounded up Justin Timberlake, Kid Rock, Nelly, Sean "P. Diddy" Combs and others. They're some of the most popular people in music today among teens, tweens and young adults. They're also among the most overexposed, publicity-wise. CBS didn't question that, or the fact that older viewers would ask, "Justin who?"
Speaking of questions:
UWas anyone supposed to be enthralled at the prospect of seeing entertainers who weren't really singing? Heaven forbid we might hear their real voices without the benefits of recording-studio wizardry.
UShould we have sat on the edge of our sofas as they performed only portions of songs that were popular last summer or, in Janet's case, more than a decade ago?
UWasn't the halftime show supposed to have the energy of a live performance? It felt like a music video. A bad music video.
UIs anyone surprised that Justin Timberlake is a man of his word? It was his "Rock Your Body" that he and Janet were "singing" when he came to the line "Gonna have you naked by the end of this song."
UDoes Justin really know what "wardrobe malfunction" means? Word is that he expected to rip off the right cup of Janet's shiny black costume top to reveal more of her red lingerie -- if there really was more to be shown. There's an Associated Press photo of Janet covering her bare breast with her hand while Justin still clutches that piece of her outfit. A ruffle of red fabric appears to have been sewn across the top of the cup to create the illusion of an undergarment. Justin, maybe you've been "punk'd," too.
UWill CBS look for more country music acts next time it plans Super Bowl entertainment? That's the theory in my household, 'cause CBS didn't have to worry about Toby Keith and Willie Nelson grabbing their crotches while singing "Beer for My Horses."
UHow 'bout that Beyonc & eacute; and Josh Groban? Miss "I Don't Think You're Ready for This Jelly" actually dressed like a lady and sang a heartfelt version of "The Star Spangled Banner" (although Whitney Houston is still the queen of national anthem performances). Groban was the young, classical-sounding singer who performed one of his songs, "You Raise Me Up," in remembrance of the space shuttle Columbia astronauts who died one year earlier. But Groban doesn't stand a chance of making the Lycos Top 50 list for this week unless he, too, has a sunburst nipple shield to flaunt.
XDebora Shaulis is entertainment editor. Write her at shaulis@vindy.com.