Annie's Mailbox New pursuits ease pain of relocation

Dear Annie: I have been married 25 years and love my husband dearly. Three months ago, "Nelson" was offered a good job in Maryland. However, it meant we had to move five hours from my children and grandchildren, and it is tearing me apart. I thought I would be able to handle the distance, but I can't.
My daughter is now separated from her husband, and I feel I should be there for her and the children. My husband has said that if I am so unhappy, he will give up the job and we will move back. But, Annie, I know that he is enjoying his new position.
I am depressed. I cry a lot. I have gotten a job in a large office, but I still am lonely for my family and friends. I said I would give it a year, but it is so much harder than I thought. My Heart is in New York
Dear N.Y.: Of course it's hard to move away from the home you've known and the family you cherish. Moving is highly stressful under the best of circumstances. However, you need to give Maryland more of a chance.
Maryland is not that far away from New York. Can you save up mileage so you can visit your daughter perhaps one weekend a month (more often if you can afford it)? Have you joined a church or synagogue where you can become involved in its activities? Does your new apartment, condo or neighborhood have a social committee? These efforts will provide a distraction from your unhappiness and allow you to make new friends.
Dear Annie: I was raised not to make noise when I eat. I don't smack, crunch or chew with my mouth open.
I realize some foods make noise, like crackers or cucumbers, but in my group of friends, there is a woman who crunches the ice in her drink. This is like nails on a blackboard to the rest of us. The subject has been brought to her attention, but she told us in no uncertain terms that she liked to crunch ice and doesn't plan to stop.
Now what do we do, other than dissolve the group get-together, which we really don't want to do? Deafened in South Carolina
Dear S.C.: Your friend may have an iron deficiency. One of the symptoms is the desire to crunch ice. Really. Tell her you are worried about her health and suggest she talk to her doctor. Beyond that, there's not much you can do to dissuade her from crunching. If she is too inconsiderate to stop when asked, you might want to avoid including her in these outings.
Dear Annie: You printed a letter from a woman who said her co-workers treated the new supervisor poorly. This woman works for a state agency. Heavens, she's working with a bunch of children, paid by your taxes to run a department.
I am Canadian, and we're doing our darndest to root out bad employees in government positions. You said to let the supervisor handle these juvenile employees. My answer is to go above his head and ask for a private meeting with the head honcho to spill the beans. Something has to break here, and staying silent is the worst possible solution for all, including the taxpayer. Nepean, Ontario
Dear Ontario: You may be right, but we believe the new supervisor should be granted the opportunity to assert his authority and deal with the situation on his own before bringing in the big guns. Asking the higher-ups to deal with this assumes the supervisor cannot handle his staff, and this will undercut whatever respect he could earn if given the chance.
Creators Syndicate