Being around 'Dotty' hurts emotional health

Dear Annie: My older sister and I have reverted to our childhood sibling rivalry with a ven-geance, and I don't know what to do about it.
We are both middle-aged women, so I cannot imagine why we haven't gotten past this. "Dotty" is a considerate and kind person toward everyone she knows, except me. Her snide remarks, her unreasonable anger, and especially her negative comments about me to my husband, have made me distrust her. As a result, I have decided that I cannot have her in my life, even though I have no other family. Being around her is damaging to my emotional health.
Please help me understand why this has resurfaced in our lives at this late stage and whether I have any other way to resolve this problem other than to avoid her entirely. The Baby Sister Again
Dear Baby Sister: Obviously, Dotty has some sibling issues that she has never worked through. Chances are, she also has other problems in her life right now, and reverting to her childhood behavior is how she is dealing with them. Unless she is willing to seek counseling and understand her resentment, nothing will change.
Before cutting the ties, give Dotty one last chance. Tell her you love her, but her negative attitude undermines the bond you share. Ask if she will consider talking to a third party (perhaps a clergyperson, counselor or mutual friend), so you can work on the problem together. If she refuses, at least you will know you made the effort.
Dear Annie: I am 24, and my dad passed away when I was 12. A few years ago, Mom remarried, but it ended in a friendly divorce. Mom isn't the most outgoing person, but she is great company once you get to know her. The problem is that my sisters and I have our own lives and friends, and we feel guilty that Mom is alone.
Mom is the only one of her friends who is single. Is there anything we can do to help her get out and meet some new people? Chicago Daughter
Dear Daughter: First, make sure your mother truly wants your help. If she is indeed looking for company, encourage her to do volunteer work, join a choir or book club, take salsa lessons, work on a political campaign, etc. When your mother meets people with similar interests, she can make new connections. Good luck.
Dear Annie: I am 14 years old and read your column every day. The question I have does not concern me, but my friend "Emily." Emily is older by only a few months, and we are quite alike, except for one thing. Emily has a problem with perspiration under her arms.
This problem started about six months ago. Since then, it has caused her repeated embarrassment, discomfort and even a few ruined shirts. She's tried what I would call everything, but it seems to make it worse. She's taken to wearing toilet paper under her arms to keep it under control, though it never stops.
I'm very concerned about Emily because she can hardly stand to go out anywhere. She's not living her life because of it. I'm hoping you can help. Concerned Friend in the USA
Creators Syndicate
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