Annie's Mailbox Marrying 'Monty' so soon is risky

Dear Annie: I am in love with the perfect guy. We have been dating for three months and are so convinced we're perfect for each other that we've announced plans to marry soon.
Why am I writing? Well, "Monty" has been married twice before, and both marriages ended as a result of his cheating. He swears he is a changed man, and I believe him. He looks me in the eyes and tells me I am the woman he has been searching for and needing all his life, and I know it's true.
I am 30 and have never been married. I can hardly wait to have children with Monty and raise them together. He is excited, too. He is in his mid-40s and has two children who are young teens. He is active in his children's lives, and he and his ex are parenting their kids quite amicably. However, I do sense odd feelings from his associates, but no one has said anything to me. (I did once overhear someone say, "There goes the Bill Clinton of Oregon," when we passed by.)
I love Monty deeply, yet now that I write this, I have even more doubts in the back of my head. Hurry and give me your advice. Pondering in Portland
Dear Portland: Monty sounds like a risky proposition, and the fact that you are watching your biological clock may make you feel pressured to marry. You've been dating for only three months. Frankly, that's not enough time to get to know anyone well enough to marry. Slow down. Knowing Monty's background, we recommend dating him exclusively for one year before making any permanent decisions.
Dear Annie: My parents are quite wealthy. Over the past seven years (I'm 25) I've worked and saved, because my parents and I feel this is a skill I need to learn. I have given up many things I wanted in order not to run to Mom and Dad every time I was in a bind. My boyfriend, however, thinks it's OK to use my money every time we eat out because I have rich parents to fall back on and he doesn't.
This really bothers me because I was raised to rely on no one -- to work hard for what I want. I should mention that this year, I moved back to my hometown, where I haven't been able to find a job. My boyfriend works two jobs, while I am using my savings to pay for our dates. What do you think of this? Bling Bling Bovine
Dear Cash Cow: We think your boyfriend is a freeloader, and if you don't straighten him out immediately, he is likely to continue. If he can't afford to help pay for your dates while you are unemployed, cook at home and rent a video. Once you are back on your feet, however, all expenses should be split between the two of you.
Unless your parents come along on your dates, their income should not be a factor.
Dear Annie: I recently had a birthday party for my 3-year-old son. The mother of one of the invited children called the day before to say her son was "really sick" and would not be able to attend the party.
However, the next day, the sick child showed up with a runny nose and fever. His mom explained that she "didn't want him to miss out." We tried to make the best of it as the boy touched the food and mingled with the other kids, wiping his nose with his hands. We're praying that no one else gets sick as a result of this contact.
Please tell parents to keep sick kids at home. It's hard enough keeping the little ones well this winter without this added strain on their immune systems. Thanks for spreading the word. California Mom
Dear Calif. Mom: You should have stopped that boy and his idiot mother at the door and announced loudly, "Jimmy came by to say hello, but he has to go home now. He's very sick." Then thank her for coming and usher her out. What nerve.
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