By MICHELLE GUIDO

By MICHELLE GUIDO
KNIGHT RIDDER NEWSPAPERS
Most women have no qualms talking about deep emotional issues, the trials and tribulations of motherhood or hitting the glass ceiling.
But when it comes to money, women often either can't discuss it -- or won't.
"I have met with so many brilliant, wonderful women who are very successful, but when they sit in my office with the door closed, they fall apart when it's time to talk about money," said Rita Rothstein, an associate vice president with Morgan Stanley in Cupertino, Calif. A former social worker, Rothstein also volunteers her time to give seminars on the topic.
Why is it important for women to not only talk about, but also pay close attention to, their finances and money goals? Because so many find themselves -- after a divorce, death of a spouse or other life transition -- woefully unprepared to proceed alone financially.
Here are points
During a recent presentation at a gathering of Silicon Valley Women in Business, a chapter of the National Association for Female Executives, Rothstein brought up some startling facts:
UWomen put the same percentage of their salaries into 401(k) accounts (company-sponsored retirement savings plans) as men do, but they end up with far less money because they make less.
UThey are typically out of the job market for some time while rearing children, which limits not only their income but also their contributions to retirement plans.
UOn average, women live seven years longer than men.
UAccording to Business Week magazine, the average age of widowhood is 56 years.
UThe average widow goes through her husband's life insurance in 21/2 months. That sounds shocking, but many people only have life insurance -- which averages $50,000 or less -- through their workplace. The amount goes quickly when funeral expenses need to be paid.
UFifty percent of all marriages end in divorce.
"One way to look at this is that chances are you will either get divorced or be widowed," Rothstein said. "Either way, you are probably going to have to handle your money at some time in your life -- why not start now?"
Loretta Chappelle of San Jose, Calif., got divorced eight years ago after 30 years of marriage and rearing three children. At age 50, she found herself starting over not just emotionally, but financially as well. Just after the divorce, she went into high-tech sales, which was great for her economically, but when the market went south, so did her portfolio.
Now 58, Chappelle has started another career, as a real estate agent. But divorce taught her some valuable money lessons.
"He was the major breadwinner and though I've always worked, he was transferred a lot, so I just picked up whatever jobs were available," Chappelle said. "When the marriage ended, I literally had nothing."
So with her first high-tech sales commission check, she put a down payment on a townhouse in San Jose. When that piece of property increased in value, she bought another. And another. Now, Chappelle has three homes, a 401(k) and IRAs (individual retirement accounts).
"I didn't look after myself financially when I was younger," she said. "And when I was forced to look after myself, it was later in life, so now I'm playing catch-up."
Chappelle has some advice for younger women: Always plan for your own financial future -- even if you're happily married, but especially if you're single.
That's good advice, agrees Gail Buckner, a senior vice president for Putnam Investments in Boston.
Support matters
"Single women are in the biggest jeopardy because married couples have each other to fall back on," said Buckner, who also hosts a financial news show called "Money Matters" on Fox News Network.
"A single person doesn't have that support, and single women don't have the income that men do, so they are most likely to find themselves in financial trouble later."
Buckner said some women shy away from investing in equities (stocks) because they assume they don't know as much about the stock market as men do. Women also tend to think that as they get older, they should avoid risk -- which translates into avoiding the stock market.
"I don't care how old a woman is, a substantial part of her portfolio should be invested in stocks," Buckner said. "The biggest mistake women make is they don't recognize that the biggest threat to their standard of living is not whether or not they have a man to take care of them; it's inflation."
If inflation is about 3 percent a year, she said, women have to double their income in fewer than 20 years to be able to sustain their current lifestyle. And most women don't make more money as they age in the work force -- they make less -- especially if they have to change jobs to accommodate having children.
At 25, Vicki Viso of San Jose is already preparing for her financial future.
Viso said she chose her field -- she works as an insurance agent for New York Life -- because she has seen a lot of death and loss in her own family and she wants financial security. She has a setup that other 20-somethings might scoff at: a 401(k), IRA, life insurance and long-term care insurance.
"I've seen what money can do to families, bring them together and tear them apart," she said. "Even though I'm 25, I think it's important to educate people -- and especially women -- about protecting their futures. A lot of my friends are young and they blow their money left and right."
Finding the cash
Rothstein of Morgan Stanley said many women she talks to think they can't afford to invest in an IRA or 401(k). But she tries to convince them it's quite affordable by asking them to pay close attention to what they spend to see if there isn't as little as $5 a day they could save.
That alone is more than $1,800 a year they could be putting into an IRA. Or even putting $25 a month into mutual funds is a place to start. The point, she said, is that everyone can afford to put something away for the future.
Rothstein, 54, gives free monthly seminars called "Smart Women Finish Rich," based on a book by David Bach. She said women need to think ahead, and be vigilant about taking care of themselves financially.
"There are a lot of women my age who end up divorced or widowed and all of a sudden they are forced to be responsible for their money and make sure they can retire and be OK," Rothstein said.
"When everything's falling apart, that's not the time to start learning about this stuff because you're so emotionally devastated, and you don't make good decisions."