Tales from dark side of Hubbard mansion

The haunted mansion is entertaining for everyone.
By BOB JACKSON
VINDICATOR STAFF WRITER
HUBBARD -- The last thing you see before stepping into the Hubbard Kiwanis Club's haunted mansion is a sign that says, "Enjoy the show."
Good advice.
And unlike the ghoul-filled mazes that await inside, it's easy to follow.
For the faint of heart, the three floors and 16 rooms of doom are enough to bring on screams, gasps, shrieks and maybe even -- bwaaaaahahahahahaaaaa -- nightmares!
And even for those who are unfazed -- or at least claim to be -- by walking through the "other side," there are enough cool effects and surprises to make for a fun, entertaining time.
Total darkness
Visitors are first ushered upstairs to the third floor. After being admonished -- by a ghoul, of course -- against using flashlights, light sticks or any other illuminating device while inside the facility, you step through the doorway and are immediately lost in total, blinding darkness.
You blindly grope your way through the pitch-black maze, whose walls seem to get narrower and narrower as you go along, seemingly squeezing in on you. If you're claustrophobic, don't freak out. You'll eventually come out of it. Or at least you should.
Even my strapping 19-year-old son, who's been visiting haunted houses with me for seven years now, found himself laughing nervously, pawing the darkness with his hand to find my back or arm and then asking, "Is that you?"
And I, admittedly, caught myself looking over my shoulder to make sure he was still behind me.
As is the case with every haunted house, the trick to being properly scared is never knowing where or when an attack is coming. The element of surprise is crucial, so I'll give away no secrets here.
Ol' one-two
Suffice it to say that fright often comes from the most unlikely places. Sometimes they get you with the ol' one-two -- with one monster screaming at you while you're still on the adrenaline rush from the one that jumped out of the wall a skipped heartbeat earlier.
There's a hallway lined with glow-in-the dark masks. You just know there's someone behind at least one of them... but which one... or ones?
We liked the haunted kitchen, where the table is set with platters of all sorts of yucky, gory stuff.
Halls are lined with people screaming in terror, goblins behind bars, floating skulls, disembodied torsos and gobs of cobwebs.
You'll take a wild ride down a slippery slide, dropping into the basement.
The finishing touch is a room filled with smoke so thick it burns your nose. Overhead strobe lights flash maddeningly, reflecting off the smoke and making it as difficult to navigate as the darkness.
It took us a little less than 15 minutes to make it from beginning to end.
The haunted mansion is open Friday, Saturday and Sunday, Oct. 23-26 and Oct. 28-Nov. 1. Hours are 7-10 p.m. Sundays and Thursdays, and 7-11 p.m. Fridays and Saturdays. Admission is $5 person.
bjackson@vindy.com