KATHY MITCHELL AND MARCY SUGAR | Annie's Mailbox He's looking for someone to share his life with

Dear Annie: Believe it or not, I am a 36-year-old male virgin. Women don't seem to have any interest in me. I've had very few dates in my life, and not one led to a serious relationship. I'm a decent guy. I don't smoke or drink, and I try to treat people with respect. I definitely don't look like Brad Pitt, but I don't think I'm Quasimodo, either. Although once, when I went to pick up a woman for a blind date, as soon as she saw me at the door, she said she was expecting someone else.
I want to have someone in my life to share and do things with. It's depressing to go to the movies alone. I want to be able to say, "I love you," and hear it back. Please don't say try a church group, as I'm not religious in any way. And since I don't drink, bars and nightclubs are out of the question. Annie, is there hope for me? Lonely in New York
Dear N.Y.: If women are closing doors in your face, your physical appearance may present a problem, and that means women aren't giving you the opportunity to show what a great guy you are. We'll assume you've asked your friends and relatives to critique your appearance and you have made any necessary improvements to your hair, hygiene and wardrobe. So, we recommend the Internet. Reliable online services will give you a chance to find a woman who will fall in love with your personality, and your looks will be less important. Please try it.
Dear Annie: This is in response to "End of My Rope," who said her clean-freak husband is driving her nuts. I have the opposite problem.
I love my wife, but to be frank, she is a slob. She leaves her dirty dishes, laundry and trash all over the house. She never makes the bed, nor does she dust or vacuum. Our children are just like her. When I ask for help with the housekeeping, the kids scatter, and my wife says I am "obsessive." We have dirty windows, stained walls and sticky floors. A neighbor recently had to move my wife's underwear to find a place to sit on the sofa.
After years of fighting this losing battle, I have given up. I do whatever dishes and laundry I generate, and I maintain separate closet and dresser space. I make the bed every other day and take out my own trash. I pick up everyone else's items and deposit them into a pile in the center of our spare room. When my wife and kids run out of dishes or clothes, they pick through the pile until they find what they need.
Soon, we will no longer be able to get into the spare room. At that point, I will have a big yard sale, followed by a bigger bonfire. No Longer Sweating It
Dear No Longer Sweating It: We admire your attitude (and fortitude). It can't be easy living with slobs, although in all fairness, women have been cleaning up after their families for generations. You are right, however, not to make your home a constant battleground. If you can afford any outside help, please get some.
Dear Annie: My 4-year-old son reads at first-grade level, counts and knows sign language. When he was 3, he wanted to go to school, but we told him he had to be potty trained first. He said, "OK," and that week he trained himself.
Unfortunately, the schools around here will not take him, even though he is smarter than most kindergartners. What should we do? Milford, Pa.
Dear Milford: Raising a gifted child is a challenge. Contact the Pennsylvania Dept. of Education, which mandates programs for gifted children. Look into preschool programs or private programs for gifted children in your area. Also check your local library for information on the subject, and supplement his learning at home with books, CDs, games, and so on. Good luck -- and try not to brag too much.
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