KATHY MITCHELL AND MARCY SUGAR \ Annie's Mailbox Neighbor sees a problem with their nudity

Dear Annie: I have a problem with my neighbors. They seem to think they are invisible when they walk around nude in their bedroom or get out of the shower. Their curtains and shades are always wide open. The homes in our neighborhood are close together, and when their lights are on, we can see straight through their house. I have a young son who thinks this is hilarious, but it's not something to which I want him exposed.
I have gotten to know their daily routine, so I can usually close our shades when they are undressed. However, I feel nudity is a private thing and they should be the ones to close their shades, not me. It's an awkward situation and not something I feel comfortable mentioning to them. What can I do? Not So Neighborly in Ohio
Dear Ohio: Are these neighbors aware that you can see them? You'd be surprised how oblivious some folks are. Knock on their door and say nicely, "I'm sure you don't realize how easy it is to see inside your house. You might want to close your shades in the bedroom and bathroom."
If they still leave everything open, you can assume they are exhibitionists and enjoy the attention. People can do as they like in their own homes. If you don't want to see them, keep your shades drawn on that side of the house, plant tall bushes, or do whatever you can to improve the view.
Dear Annie: Due to the sudden death of my oldest son, I have been stuck in a depression for the past four years. I think I've developed some kind of anxiety disorder that prevents me from leaving the house. Please don't suggest I see a therapist because I have no way to pay for such help. My husband of five years has quit every job he has gotten, so there is no insurance.
Is there an honest way for me to work from home on my computer? If I could start earning some money, maybe I would get my voice back and tell him to stop being so selfish. The problem is, any criticism from me would make him walk.
I feel there is nothing to look forward to but the afterlife. I'm not suicidal, just impatiently waiting to die. How do I dig myself out of this? Imprisoned
Dear Imprisoned: Please contact The Compassionate Friends, a wonderful organization for those whose children have died. The address is: P.O. Box 3696, Oak Brook, Ill. 60522-3696 (www.compassionatefriends.org). The toll-free number is (877) 969-0010. You will find free help and support there.
Until you can work your way out of this depression, it will be difficult to find the energy to deal with your husband and your anxiety. Start with one small step.
Dear Annie: I am 16 years old, and my mom is 48 and overweight. I try to help, but she doesn't seem to make any effort to eat less. I know she can do it.
It's really frustrating for me to question Mom's eating habits. When she goes for a second helping at dinner, I might say, "Oh, you're gonna eat that, too?" She'll give me a look and some excuse like, "I didn't have much for lunch." Sometimes she eats the equivalent of two dinners. I'm worried about her. Too Young to Help
Dear Too Young: Your heart is in the right place, but your efforts are making things worse. If you truly want to help, say nothing more about Mom's weight or what she eats. Instead, ask if she'd like to come for a walk with you after dinner, so you can talk about school or friends. Tell her you're interested in a dance class at the park district and you'd like some company. When your mom is ready to do more, she will. Meanwhile, just let her know you love her. That will help the most.
XE-mail your questions to anniesmailbox@com-cast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, Ill. 60611.
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