DIANE MAKAR MURPHY Hairs on my chin? Isn't that wonderful!

On Tuesday I turned 47. The day before, I went on the Internet and looked up "little red dots," coupling it with "old age" -- because I'd never HAD little red dots on my body before this year. Now I have them, like odd little freckles, in various locations.
Sure enough, up came a column by a woman opining the arrival of "little red dots," teaming them with sagging breasts, puffy eyelids, chin hairs and the words "old age." This is not the combo meal I had hoped to find.
With that, something dawned on me. After playing a depressingly sullen internal tape in my head for the better part of last month (since finding one of those chin hairs, as a matter of fact), which said, "getting old is going to suck," I decided, there is not enough positive spin on this aging thing.
Folklorically, if not historically, old age is good. Obviously, it beats dying young. And who doesn't have a mental picture of a village elder dispensing wisdom to the youngins? Respect in old age was at one time a given.
But now, old age is to be avoided at all costs! If we do it right, we're to stay young even in old age. Deepak Choprah, a frequent Oprah guest, insists we needn't age at all since our cells are constantly renewed! Think young. Act young. Be young. Young. Young. Young. Phooey!
Spinning
If I can't find positive spin on being an old person in the popular media, darn it, I'll spin it. I want people to want to be old. There. I've said it. It can't be avoided (Choprah notwithstanding), so why dread it?
I'm tired of fearing the approach of a few lost memories, of worrying about the occasional entry into a room to retrieve, uh, well, whatever it was.
I don't want to obsess over a few silly hairs cascading from my nose. I want to embrace them -- to welcome their approach because they and the dark circles under my eyes, the age spots, and yes, even the little red dots, tell me I am getting old!! Yippee!
Remember when puberty gave you hair under the arms or your first cramps? You didn't think, "Oh no, this is it." You felt terrific. You were getting older! I think we should welcome old age's changes in the same way we welcomed those two rather horrific teenage events.
Look at it this way
And so, here goes. Here's the spin (no disrespect to Bill O'Reilly intended):
"Old age is the time of life of a person's greatest wisdom, richest experience, deepest insights and most complete individuality." -- The Illinois Council on Long Term Care.
"Aging means power, folks. At the start of this millennium, 76 million Americans were older than 50. These 50-plus people own more than 70 percent of the country's assets, earn almost $2 trillion, and have more than twice the discretionary spending power of the average younger household. -- Ken Dychtwald, author, "Aging Power."
"We grow neither better nor worse as we get old, but more like ourselves." -- May L. Becker.
"The spiritual eyesight improves as the physical eyesight declines." -- Plato.
"You only begin to discover the difference between what you really are, your real self, and your appearance, when you get a bit older." -- Doris Lessing.
"Youth is the gift of nature, but age is a work of art." -- Garson Kanin.
"One of the many things nobody ever tells you about middle age is that it's such a nice change from being young." -- Dorothy C. Fisher.
"If 45 is the old age of youth, 50 is the youth of our Second Adulthood." -- Gail Sheehy.
I have always loved the poem "When I Am an Old Woman I Shall Wear Purple" by Jenny Joseph. The poem suggests the penultimate benefit of growing old. And this, I contend, has no spin at all:
"You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat and eat three pounds of sausages at a go or only bread and pickles for a week and hoard pens and pencils and beer nuts and things in boxes."
Bring it on!
murphy@vindy.com