DIANE MAKAR MURPHY Valley man aims to get a jump on fund raising

Well, he ain't in Calaveras County, more like Columbiana. And you kin bet he hasn't ketched a frog lately, taken him home and "cal'klated to edercate him," as Mark Twain would say.
But Greg Shaffer is trying hard -- for the second year in a row -- to get YOU and your kids to. The clock is ticking down to his Mark Twain-inspired, July Fourth, "Seeing-Eye Frogs Jump" in Salem, and Shaffer is just about beside himself trying to jump-start some enthusiasm.
Even though Norman Leigh of The Vindicator's Salem bureau, recently wrote an entirely respectable story announcing the event, well, Shaffer would like, once again, to call your attention to it.
As for me, I got to spend an hour and a half following him through secret, frog huntin' country and, being the apparent city slicker I am, hearing the thwocking sound of a tennis shoe and pant leg heading south in a bog.
Then, I got to hear the same sound for my left foot and pant leg. And then, I got to sit on a rock, waiting for a picture of a gigantic bullfrog that never came.
"Aww, I shoulda warned yuh about the mud!" Shaffer said (though I was clearly delighted at age 47 to have finally sunk knee-high into a bog).
Colorful way of talking
Shaffer's idle conversation is punctuated with exclamation points, like that one above. In fact, if you were to imagine each of his sentences followed by a jumping frog, you'd have a good feel for my Saturday morning with him.
"For a healthy ecology," he said, "you gotta have frogs!" And, "That bullfrog you just saw was a thoroughbred! He was a champion!"
And, as we looked out over what was once "the MOTHER LODE OF ALL FROG PONDS," now bulldozed into a breeding ground for a mere two dozen giant tadpoles, "This is so disappointing! There was a foot-and-a-half long one with red eyes in here! I've never seen anything so beautiful and spectacular!"
Enthusiasm is something Shaffer has lots of. For one thing, his frog jump is meant to raise money for the Lions Club, of which he is a member. After expenses, all donations and the $2 or $3 per-frog entry fees will go toward the club's "Seeing Eye" effort to help people who need glasses or Seeing Eye dogs.
Secondly, Shaffer would like to give you an excuse to visit his hometown of Salem and to give the area's competitive frog jumpers a place to show off their amphibians. In fact, he's hoping young'uns scavenging frogs for the competition are the reason for the dearth of frogs.
As we walked along Buttermilk Run, a stream in Salem's Waterworth Memorial Park -- a hop, skip and a jump from where the event will be held -- Shaffer opined, "This stream needs re-frogged." This was possibly his only remark not punctuated with an exclamation point.
And third, Shaffer would like to give his community a chance to come together. Pointing at the band shell near the projected frog competition field, he said, basically, everyone is welcome to engage the microphone. Choirs, politicians, musicians, bands, tap dancers, community groups, maybe even the singing bullfrogs themselves, are invited.
In your hands
Now, whether any will show up, I s'pose, kind readers, is up to you.
Shaffer is projecting 80 frogs will be competing -- "Do you know how to make a frog jump? You have to put your finger right between their eyes! Do you know how to tell the difference between a male and female bullfrog? The males have an ear that's twice as big as the female! Did you know each type of frog has a different language!"
Well, if you didn't, don't worry; if you bump into Shaffer, you'll learn that and more.
Now, finally, Shaffer is concerned that I fetch you to the right place. Please use the north Sunset Boulevard entrance to Waterworth Park. The first contest will start at 3 p.m. Friday, (but if you're a tap dancer or politician, you may want to start stompin' and stumpin' before the jumpin').
XFor more information, call Shaffer at (330) 337-0093,or e-mail him at gtoner@connectohio.net.
murphy@vindy.com