KATHY MITCHELL AND MARCY SUGAR | Annie's Mailbox They should overlook this one harmless flaw

Dear Annie: My husband's parents and I have a decent relationship. They live 4,000 miles away, so we try to keep things as pleasant as possible when they visit.
My mother-in-law (I'll call her Donna) is rather pushy, but she's quite lovable, and I like her. However, for the past two years, she has been buying cards for us to give to other people. She bought a Father's Day card for my husband to give to his dad. For my birthday, she bought a "For My Wife" card for my husband to give me. It doesn't stop there. She's given us cards to sign for our own child's birthday. Last week, one of her friends passed away, and she selected a sympathy card for us to send to the family. We did not know this friend or her family.
I know this isn't a big deal, but it's become quite annoying. We have never forgotten birthdays or holidays, and are perfectly capable of selecting our own cards. How do I get her to stop doing this? Wife in Kentucky
Dear Wife: Mom probably spends a lot of time in the card shop. When she finds something useful, she believes she's doing you a favor by buying it on your behalf. Since she is otherwise "lovable," please overlook this flaw. When she gives you a card, say "thanks," and put it aside. Whether or not to use it is up to you.
Dear Annie: I am a 65-year-old woman, and my boyfriend, "Oliver," is 70. We have been living together in his home for the past 20 years. He's made it clear that he has no interest in getting married.
In all the years we've been together, Oliver has never taken me out to eat, nor does he spend any money on me. I buy all of the groceries, clean the house, do the laundry and cook. The problem is, I am getting older, and I'm afraid if something happens to Oliver, I'll be left out in the cold.
The man is not poor. He has lots of money and owns a couple of houses, including the one we live in. He was kind enough to tell me that I can stay in his house as long as I want after he is gone, although it will legally belong to his children. He is leaving everything to his children. I thought he'd at least leave the house to me.
I have invested a lot of years and love in this relationship. If he really loved me, shouldn't he be concerned about how I will be cared for after he is gone? I have tried talking to him and even threatened to leave, but nothing changed. He still continues to be a tightwad. I actually hear him squeaking when he walks.
This letter should open the eyes of couples who live together without committing to marriage. I feel like an old fool. Imminent Bag Lady
Dear Bag Lady: Talk to a lawyer about your legal rights and your financial situation. Have the lawyer put in writing that you can live in the house after Oliver dies. As it is, you help support Oliver in exchange for living rent-free. Only you can decide if the dubious pleasure of his company is worth your peace of mind.
Dear Annie: I am tired of co-workers borrowing my daily newspaper. It costs only 50 cents. Why can't they buy their own? When I suggested to one person that we alternate buying the newspaper, he never asked to read it again, nor did he come back to my office. Was I wrong? Annoyed in Ottawa, Ontario
Dear Ottawa: No. Perhaps the office staff would be willing to chip in for a subscription to the Ottawa Sun that everyone could enjoy. If not, tell your co-workers you would be happy to give them your newspaper when you are finished with it.
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