KATHY MITCHELL AND MARCY SUGAR | Annie's Mailbox Baby-sitting situation has caused concern

Dear Annie: Our 15-year-old daughter, "Julie," is an excellent and experienced baby sitter. Last month, the new neighbors hired her for their two sons, ages 10 and 7. "The Smiths" planned to attend a major function about two hours away. Her instructions were to microwave supper, supervise the children's baths, and let them play games or watch television until 9 p.m.
Julie phoned me at 8 p.m. to check in and say she had fed and bathed the boys. At 11 p.m., Mrs. Smith called to say they could not make it back that night and would return in the morning. I went over and checked on Julie and the boys, and everything was fine, so I left her there. At 10 the next morning, Julie said the Smiths came home disheveled and appeared to have hangovers. They paid her quite well and drove her home.
The Smiths have asked Julie to sit again. I am a bit concerned about this because I think they might take advantage of her. Julie thinks I have no reason to worry. She says she is never more than a few blocks away and the neighborhood is quite safe. Should I let her sit for these people again? New York
Dear New York: While the parents should have told Julie if there was a possibility they'd be gone overnight, it was probably just as well they didn't drive home, considering their inebriated condition.
It's too soon to know if this is a pattern or not. It may have been a one-time lapse. Since Julie was well paid and she'd like to sit for this couple again, tell her she may do so. Be sure to call her during the evening and make certain everything is OK. If the Smiths repeat their behavior, Julie should not be permitted to sit for them again.
Dear Annie: I have a group of five friends, and we like to celebrate one another's birthdays by going out to lunch together. Unfortunately, my birthday happens to coincide with the annual school fundraiser. For the past two years, "Emma" has brought the school order forms for cookies and wrapping paper, and expects our group to buy from her during the birthday luncheon. Last year, she sold raffle tickets, as well.
I adore Emma and would never want to hurt her feelings, but I feel it is improper to use our celebration for this purpose. Any suggestions would be appreciated. It's a Wrap in Philly
Dear Philly: Emma should not be taking advantage of her friends by cornering them at a luncheon and pressuring them to buy things. Call her before your next birthday, and tell her the rest of you have decided there will be no solicitations at the luncheon. Ask her to leave the fund-raising material at home, and let her know if she contacts you later, you will try to purchase something to help raise money for the school. And follow through.
Dear Annie: I recently attended a large dinner where the hostess announced that the centerpiece would go to the person who had a birthday closest to that date.
One person at our table had her birthday five days before, and another had a birthday seven days later. Who should get the centerpiece? Your answer is extremely important to me and many others. Annoyed in Dover, Mass.
Dear Dover: Unless the hostess specifically meant a future birthday, and said so, the centerpiece should go to the one whose birthday was five days before.
XE-mail your questions to anniesmailbox@tbi.com, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, Ill. 60611.
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