STRATEGY Preparing can make for relaxed holiday

Create a fun stress-free Thanksgiving by planning ahead.
By CHRIS CASSON MADDEN
SCRIPPS HOWARD
As hectic as our lives are today, the arrival of the holiday season makes most of us feel still more stress to get everything done and to get it done with style and panache.
Thanksgiving, in particular, with its emphasis on family and food, can frazzle even the most organized of us as we try to prepare the perfect bird while family and friends enjoy themselves in perfect harmony.
I've made a resolution and I want to share it with you: This year I propose that we all create a relaxed Thanksgiving by planning ahead, by trying new ideas for food and entertaining and by honoring traditions from years past.
My family has celebrated Thanksgiving in a myriad of ways. Sometimes now it's just my husband, my sons and me. When my boys were small we'd go to New York for the Macy's Parade, then join friends in the city for dinner. At other times good friends have joined us at our home or we have gotten together with my sisters and their families.
And I admit it; coming from a large family as I do I think I'm incapable of cooking a turkey weighing less than 21 pounds.
The key
The key to a more relaxed holiday is flexibility. After you've decided on your guest list, whether it's a big family gathering or a small potluck with co-workers and friends, the first step is to get organized.
First, plan your meal and if you're one of those people who tries to cook everything from the basted bird to the mashed potatoes, delegate some of it. Since they usually offer anyway, ask guests coming to your home if they'll bring a side dish, bread or a favorite dessert. Variety only adds to the look and taste of the meal.
Take a relaxed approach to your tabletop. Thanksgiving usually calls for formality, but using the gourds, fruits and foliage of the season in casual arrangements are equally lovely for foyer tables, mantles and centerpieces. Gather tree or shrub branches with the leaves still on them and place them in tall containers. Get out your good china if you wish, but you can also mix and match dishes and silverware, and you can unify the look with cloth napkins.
Plan ahead if you have a children's table so there will be activities and puzzles to keep the small guests occupied.
Some other ideas for creating a more relaxing Thanksgiving:
UPrepare and then freeze some of your meal in advance to save time and kitchen space on Thanksgiving itself.
UAdd personality to your table by taking Polaroids of your guests when they arrive, and use them as place cards. I keep a supply of small picture frames to place at the table, and this gives children another activity to do, as well. When my sons were small, we would have them make place cards with crayon drawings of their relatives that we still pull out on the holiday.
UContinue traditions each year by getting out and using collections, such as salt and pepper shakers.
UKeep a folder or notebook of your favorite recipes. That will keep them all in one place, and can be passed down to the next generation.
UAfter the meal, ask each guest to tell the group what they were most thankful for in the past year.
I admit that one year when things got too busy we ordered a turkey and all the fixings. I had a little pinch of guilt. But you know what? It tasted just as good. So take time to plan a more casual Thanksgiving and you may actually get to truly enjoy this great holiday.