HOLIDAY SEASON Dreaming of the right Christmas? Ease the stress

Christmas doesn't have to be expensive to be merry, a CSB supervisor says.
By PETER H. MILLIKEN
VINDICATOR STAFF WRITER
YOUNGSTOWN -- The holiday season is a stressful time for families, but there are ways for families to help themselves and for concerned friends and neighbors to offer assistance, a supervisor with the Mahoning County Children Services Board says.
"We've got a lot of families that are feeling the pressures of unemployment and not being able to have the kinds of Christmases that they would want with their children," said Brad Price, chief supervisor of the agency's intake department. "There are a lot of stressors over Christmastime. Everything seems to magnify itself over Christmas," he added.
"How do they make a happy time for the children? How do they make it a peaceful time for the children? If they put the children first in their thoughts, everything else sort of fits in place," he said. "We encourage people to have a simple Christmastime, but a joyous one. You don't have to have 500 presents sitting under the tree. You can make a present for somebody and they can be just as appreciative," he said.
Don't need expensive gifts
Financially stressed families should realize they can enjoy the holidays with their children without having to buy expensive gifts, Price said.
"We encourage people to take advantage of all the presents that are being donated," and avail themselves of that assistance as early as possible, he said.
Needy families have many sources to turn to for donated gifts, including the Salvation Army, the toy drive at General Motors in Lordstown and the Marine Corps Toys for Tots program, he said.
But assistance to needy families isn't limited to institutional systems and programs, Price said, emphasizing the role caring individuals can play. "Just ordinary people reaching out to families in need can go a long way in reducing those stressors," he observed.
Seeking to help
Those seeking to offer assistance to families can turn to school principals, teachers and church pastors to identify needy families and the type of assistance that would most benefit them, said Price, a former police officer, case worker and youth leader.
Someone can help by donating a Christmas tree or a Christmas dinner, offering to watch a family's children while the parents enjoy a brief respite away from home, or offering to drive a family member to a medical appointment, Price said.
The early cold snap this year has added to an already stressful season, he said, noting that the Rescue Mission has been filled to capacity on several recent occasions. Cold weather adds the stresses of utility shutoffs and car trouble to families that are already struggling financially, he said.
The stresses of the holiday season also contribute to frustrations that bring about the child abuse and neglect referrals Children Services receives, Price said.
The agency receives an average of about 200 such referrals a month, but it experienced 40 referrals in two days, the Monday and Tuesday after Thanksgiving, Price said.
He wasn't sure what led to the recent surge, but he said the agency often gets a flurry of calls Mondays stemming from episodes during weekend visitations. "Sometimes over the holidays, that's a big thing," Price said.
Not so joyous
In divorce cases, children may be shuttled back and forth between custodial and noncustodial parents during the Christmas period, he said. "It's not the joyous holiday for everyone that we would hope it would be," he added.
CSB, which is on call around the clock, has emergency workers who will respond if needed, even on the holidays themselves. "There's hardly ever a holiday that goes by that we don't have kids being abused or neglected," he lamented.
milliken@vindy.com