YOUNGSTOWN Kids urge peers: Don't have sex

Kids take other kids' advice when it comes to sex, peer pressure and using words that hurt.
By MARALINE KUBIK
VINDICATOR STAFF WRITER
YOUNGSTOWN -- Patrick Bokesch is a celebrity at his high school. He's a varsity football player and he doesn't have sex.
He says that not having sex is OK -- it's a good thing when you're a sophomore in high school and can't afford to make a mistake that could ruin the rest of you're life. Patrick is sharing his message with kids in grades five through 12 throughout Mahoning County.
As a member of STARS, Students Taking a Responsible Stand, Patrick teaches other kids about the risks of becoming sexually active, caving into peer pressure and using words that hurt.
Other groups: STARS is just one group of peer educators established through Mahoning County's Family and Children First Council.
There are also groups at Campbell Memorial and Woodrow Wilson high schools. Campbell's peer educators are known as DREAM, Directing Responsible Education Among Minors; Wilson's are known as PRIDE, Peers Reflecting Intelligent Decisions Effectively.
"Kids listen to us in a different way than they would an adult," Patrick explained. "I remember when I was in sixth grade, sex was a 'ha-ha' thing -- a big joke." Patrick remembers his gym instructor teaching his class about the male reproductive system: "All anybody did was laugh," he said.
Why this works: When other kids are talking, kids listen and they think about it, added Sarah Bobby, also a sophomore member of STARS. At first, talking about sex in front of a class was difficult, she said.
"I felt like I was telling them something bad, but then I realized this really helps them." Once the kids in the class overcome their initial hesitation -- and many are embarrassed just to say the word -- they can talk about anything, she said. "Kids have no idea what's going on, and we give them a clue."
"They realize they don't have to be afraid to talk about it to anyone, including their parents," Patrick noted.
Sarah and Patrick and between 40 and 50 other STARS members spend one full day every few weeks educating their peers about making good decisions and other important issues in teens' lives.
The students' schedules rotate so that none of them misses too much school or puts in too much overtime -- peer educators put in longer hours on days when they teach than they do attending classes.
"It's harder than a regular school day," Sarah said. "I always have a headache by the time I get home."
"My head hurts. My throat hurts and my feet hurt," Patrick chimed in.
Both agreed getting involved has paid off in their personal lives.
"I question myself before I do stuff," Patrick said. "And I look at kids differently."
"They know a lot of stuff," Sarah said. "We were like that."
Teen summit: Patrick and Sarah, along with members of DREAM and PRIDE, participated in the Teens-N-Truth 2nd Annual Teen Summit at Youngstown State University on Saturday, where they introduced 65 students from 11 area schools to the peer educator program.
Lynn Duffey, peer educator coordinator, said the goal is to get these kids to go back to their schools and help develop peer educator programs there.
The summit was sponsored by a Mahoning County Wellness Block Grant, Youngstown State University's Department of Human Performance and Exercise Science, and the Austintown Fitch Abstinence Only Education Grant.