Sunday, October 26, 2014
By Ed Runyan
WARREN
Lt. Dan Mason of the Warren Police Department says it’s not unusual for frustrated parents to bring their child to the police department in an effort to get them “scared straight.”
The responsibility for talking to such youngsters has fallen to him several times, such as several weeks ago when a mom brought her 10-year-old son to the police department. He was being defiant and destructive and refusing to go to school.
Mason said the mother’s threats regarding him ending up in the Trumbull County Juvenile Justice Center didn’t faze him.
“He said going to JJC would be a break from his mom and dad,” Mason said.
That’s when he told the boy a few facts about juvenile detention. Mason explained that locked up juveniles don’t just sit around.
“There are rules and chores and school work,” Mason said, adding that JJC officials “contact the school district and get their school work, and it’s mandatory that they do the assignments.”
Mason said he tries to make the juvenile understand that, “Wherever you go in life, there are rules,” and those who don’t respect rules will have a hard time, such as the numerous people Warren police arrest every week.
He said he thinks it’s important for the parents to make children understand the consequences of bad behavior, even if that means spanking, to get their attention — something Mason acknowledges many parents today think is inappropriate.
Mason said he believes spanking is still productive if used within limits — never when the parent is angry and not in a way that causes an injury.
Judy Murphy, a manager with Trumbull County Children Services, said “a quick, swift response” such as spanking is OK in some cases.
“I’m talking about a small child to keep them from running into the street or touching a hot pan,” Murphy said.
“But in a case like this [a 10-year-old boy], I would think what the mom did will stick with him and have a much more positive impact than if she had used corporal punishment,” Murphy said.
“If you ask that kid 10 years from now, he’ll remember being taken down to the police department,” she said. When parents are calm, they can generally come up with alternatives to spanking that will work best, such as taking away a gaming system, she said.
“I remember being grounded from my bike and being stifled from my freedom,” she said.
Murphy said poverty and drug use in Trumbull County have interfered with some parents’ ability to be good parents.
“Most of our parents [involved with Children Services] want to provide better for their kids. They just don’t always have the means. A lot of the parents were not raised well themselves. They struggle because, when they were children, their needs were not met.”
Jolene Calderone, chief diversion officer for the Trumbull County Family Court, which handles juvenile matters, said the “scared-straight” philosophy of correcting bad behavior has been “proven not to work” for most children.
The Trumbull County JJC doesn’t routinely provide tours or JJC experiences to show young people the consequences of bad behavior, but it will provide parents with suggestions for where to go for help.
Among the suggestions are the child’s school or “211,” the Mahoning-Trumbull-Columbiana counties hotline, which can recommend counseling agencies. The 211 service is operated by the Help Hotline Crisis Center in Youngstown.
Bill Mullane, former Warren G. Harding High School principal, who worked 28 years in the Warren City Schools and the last nine at schools in Ashtabula County, said “the majority of kids are functioning fine,” but more kids are in trouble today than 20 years ago.
One reason is the loss of community resources such as the Rebecca Williams Community Center, the city pool at Packard Park, programs at the Warren YMCA and YWCA, and a beloved recreation program that had “a teacher at 12 playgrounds.”
In some schools, students have to “pay to play,” which reduces participation. “Certainly the community has some responsibility for what we let go,” Mullane said. “There were always places to go,” he said of of growing up in Warren.
To Mullane, a key to success of any child is adult involvement in a child’s life. These influences counteract destructive messages they receive from sources such as violent movies or video games.
“Where does a single mother go for role models for their male child?” Mullane asked. “More and more, you see parents in utter frustration. It comes from years and years of lack of structure.”
Mullane said parental expectations were clear when he was growing up. “I can’t imagine looking at either of my parents and saying, ‘I’m not going to school.’”