Sunday, July 25, 2010
By KATHY MITCHELL and MARCY SUGAR
Dear Annie: My 50-year-old husband and I have been married for 24 years. “Fred” is constantly texting a 35-year-old divorced woman he used to work with. He insists they are only friends who like to keep in touch. They start texting before 6 a.m. and continue until bedtime. Today, they exchanged 373 text messages. I don’t know how either of them gets any work done.
We have had several conversations about the amount of contact he has with this former co-worker, but he just doesn’t get it, which means it isn’t going to stop anytime soon. Even our kids keep asking who Dad is texting all the time. I don’t believe he has physically cheated on me, but I’m not sure how long this “friendship” can continue before it grows into a full-blown affair. It may only be a midlife crisis, but it scares me and I fear for our marriage.
Having a Nervous Breakdown in Tennessee
Dear Tennessee: Have a heart-to-heart with Fred. Tell him that a loving, caring, faithful husband would not continue to behave in a way that undermines his marriage and worries his wife. Tell him it’s time to knock it off. If he cannot do this, or is unwilling, the next step is marriage counseling. Don’t wait.
Dear Annie: My 9-year-old daughter, “Emily,” has been pestering me to shave her head. She asked me to do this last year, and I said, “Maybe next summer,” thinking she’d forget. But she’s been asking for months and keeps saying I “promised.”
Annie, I shave my head because I started going bald a few years ago. My 13-year-old son shaves his head in the summer because it’s cooler. “Emily” has beautiful long hair, and I’m reluctant to cut it.
She said she wants to donate her hair to Locks of Love. Emily is a very intelligent girl and a wonderful child. While I’m proud of her for wanting to contribute to a worthwhile organization, I wouldn’t know how to answer people when they ask why my daughter is bald. Should my wife and I let our daughter shave her head?
Father of Mini-Me
Dear Father: Yes. While we believe parents have the final say in such matters (and it’s OK to say no), shaving one’s head is relatively harmless and the hair will grow back. Plus, she is donating her hair to a worthy cause. If others ask, that is the response you should give.
Dear Annie: This is a response to “Sad Mom,” whose daughter wasn’t invited to a birthday party. The birthday girl should be able to invite whomever she wants to her party, not what “Sad” wants. Maybe that birthday girl will resent having to invite someone she is not too fond of because the school made her do it.
Just Saying in D.C.
Dear Just Saying: Birthday parties are a problem when the birthday girl invites the entire class except for one child. It is amazingly rude, and her parents should teach her better manners.
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