Sunday, December 21, 2008
Dear Annie: Today I mourn the loss of a dear friend. She was vibrant, energetic and full of life, but on a crisp autumn afternoon, she committed suicide. She was only 35 and left behind two beautiful little girls.
My friend spent her life inspiring other women to get fit by opening her own women’s fitness center. I do not know what transpired in the final hours of her life, but I do know she had been under a tremendous amount of stress. I have been in the health-care profession for many years and am ashamed to say I missed the warning signs.
I cannot change what has happened to my friend, but I can make other people more aware of the prevalence of depression. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, major depressive disorders affect 14.8 million American adults in any given year and depression is more prevalent in women. The median age is 32. Depression knows no boundaries. It does not discriminate against sex, race, age or profession.
If you or someone you love is showing signs of depression, please seek help. The National Institutes of Health have a wonderful Web site (www.nih.gov) and a toll free hot line (800) 273-TALK ([800] 273-8255). The National Mental Health Information Center (http://mentalhealth.samhsa.gov) is also an excellent resource.
There is a profound sense of emptiness in the families and friends left behind when a loved one commits suicide. I ask your readers to take the time to really listen to others and be aware of the warning signs of depression. Do not assume everything will work itself out. Most importantly, tell the people you love how much they mean to you. Life is so short. Don’t wait until it is too late. I did not get to say goodbye to my friend or tell her what a wonderful person she was, but her spirit will live on in the lives of all the women she inspired. Michelle in Greensboro, N.C.
Dear Michelle: Our condolences on your terrible loss. According to the National Institutes of Health, symptoms of depression include: persistent sad, anxious or “empty” feelings; feelings of hopelessness and/or pessimism; feelings of guilt, worthlessness and/or helplessness; irritability, restlessness; loss of interest in activities or hobbies once pleasurable, including sex; fatigue and decreased energy; difficulty concentrating, remembering details and making decisions; insomnia, early-morning wakefulness or excessive sleeping; overeating or appetite loss; thoughts of suicide, suicide attempts; persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment.
It is easy to miss the signs if you aren’t looking because your friend or family member seems fine, but depression increases during the winter months, especially around the holidays. Please tell your loved ones how much they mean to you.
Dear Annie: I am 24 years old, and I am trying to get my Social Security card so I can get a job. I have been in foster care most of my life and have no contact with my family. Therefore, I am not sure what hospital I was born in and can’t get a birth certificate.
I went to my school and the group home, and they say they no longer have my records. Can you steer me in the right direction? Lost in New York
Dear Lost: We contacted Kia Green at the Social Security Administration. She said you should call or visit the Bureau of Vital Statistics in the state where you were born to obtain a certified copy of your birth certificate. You don’t need to know the name of the hospital.
You can then complete an application for a Social Security card, which requires proof of U.S. citizenship (or immigrant status and work eligibility), age and identity. For more information, call (800) 772-1213.
Creators Syndicate