After wreck, 2 families cope with aftermath

Their son and brother was taken from them, and the driver responsible was not punished enough, a family says.

By JEANNE STARMACK

VINDICATOR STAFF WRITER

AUSTINTOWN — If we could take back last Sept. 26 and do it over, Fitch High School junior John Coudriet wouldn’t need a ride home from school.

His regular ride would be available this time, so he wouldn’t ask 16-year-old classmate Tom Spicker, who lived a few streets away from him on Forest Hill Drive, for a ride to his house on Idlewood Road.

Both boys would still leave school at midday to go to their jobs. Tom’s friend, Jessica Adams, might still skip out of school early and snag a ride with him.

If Tom didn’t take John home, he might not have been on Idlewood.

He wouldn’t take the bend there too fast.

And he wouldn’t leave the road and hit a tree.

Of course, there’s no taking back the events of that day.

The accident

Police estimate Tom was going 54 mph on the residential street, where 25 mph signs are posted. His red Grand Am left the right side of the road and slammed into the tree on the passenger’s side. The car spun back into the road, coming to rest against a stop sign at an intersection about a block away.

When rescuers arrived, they found Tom dazed, Jessica critically injured, and John in the back seat. John was never going to make it home.

The Coudriets — father John, mother Melissa, and younger sister Sarah, now 15 — lost their 16-year-old son and brother.

Tom, who was uninjured in the wreck, spent two days at the county juvenile detention center after his sentencing two weeks ago for aggravated vehicular homicide.

The Coudriets say the two days, which he served the weekend of June 8, was not enough.

“Even if it was 30, 60 or 90 days,” Melissa said. “Two days is nothing.”

But, his parents said, Tom’s punishment is going to last a lot longer than two days: The burden of the accident will stay with him throughout his life.

Family grieving

The Coudriets gathered in their living room days after the sentencing, along with John’s best friend, Aaron Lee. They talked about their bewilderment, frustration and pain.

The family’s boxer, Andy, sat next to Sarah on a couch when he wasn’t visiting other people in the room. The Coudriets were in the process of adopting Andy before the accident, and they got a call to pick him up the day John died.

The dog ended up being given to them as a gift the day after the funeral. “To help with the healing,” Melissa said.

But healing isn’t coming easy. Now, they don’t understand why the judge at county juvenile court only gave Tom two days’ detention.

If it were up to him, John said, Tom would have gotten 16 years — one for every year of his son’s life.

Judge Theresa Dellick “said she was sorry, but didn’t say why she was giving him two days,” Melissa said.

Judge Dellick is not permitted to discuss her cases outside the court. In her judgment entry, she noted she followed the recommendation of the probation department that Tom serve a suspended six-month sentence, except for the two days.

The report based the recommendation on Tom’s having no prior record, showing sincere remorse and being willing to accept the consequences of his actions.

A lack of remorse?

They Coudriets said, however, that they saw a lack of remorse.

The Spickers, they said, never called them. They backed out of special calling hours set up for them alone at the funeral home, Aaron said.

At school, in the lunchroom and halls, Sarah and Aaron say Tom has seen them but never said anything.

“If he was sorry, it might make it easier,” Aaron said.

Tom declined to be interviewed. But he is sorry, say his parents.

“Tommy’s been in counseling, and the therapist says he grieves differently,” said his father, Tom. “I saw him cry in court. He said he understands it’s something he can never take back.”

The Spickers also said Tom has not driven since the accident.

“He was told to turn in his license,” his father said. “He doesn’t have a key.”

Teresa Spicker said her “heart goes out” to the Coudriets. She asks that people also consider what her own family is going through.

She said it was their understanding that only Tom was invited to the special calling hours, and they feared friends of John’s would be there to confront him.

“They said they wanted Tom to meet Aaron at the funeral,” she said. “How many other kids could have been there? If we would have been able to go, I would have taken him.”

Aaron said the Spickers contacted the boys’ occupational work education teacher, who tried to arrange the special visit at the funeral home. Aaron said he worked with the OWE teacher to coordinate the visit, and he knows the Coudriets expected that Tom’s parents would also be there.

Question of forgiveness

Jessica, now 15, spent about five weeks in the hospital, the first six days in critical care. Her injuries included broken ribs, a lacerated liver and kidney, and a fractured pelvis.

A charge of aggravated vehicular assault against Tom over those injuries was dropped in January. Jessica did not want to pursue it.

“It is because it was an accident,” said Jessica. “Honestly, he’s a good kid. He’s never been in any big trouble. He’s one of my best, best friends.”

Jessica said Tom definitely made a mistake.

“Well, I do think he was driving too fast,” she said. “And he does regret it every day. He’s changed a lot. He keeps a lot of stuff in now. He does cry.”

Teresa said she realizes her son was speeding. “But it was an unfortunate accident.”

Teresa said Tom told her he wants forgiveness if the Coudriets can find it in their hearts.

The Coudriets had already thought about that.

“In the beginning, if they would have said something,” said John.

“It would make me feel a little bit better [to know they are sorry],” said Sarah.

“I’m a Catholic — I do forgive,” said Melissa. “But it will never be forgotten.”

Two families cope

The Coudriets remember John with pride.

He was beloved — 460 people attended his funeral, with a procession of 150 cars from the church to Calvary Cemetery on Youngstown’s West Side, said his father.

He was a talented sketch artist, and apprenticed at Spider’s Tattoo and Body Piercing on Mahoning Avenue.

He was considering going to college, or maybe even to the military like Aaron.

He was a good writer, too, they point out. Melissa keeps his essays from school.

“I am only a person, nothing more than anyone else in the room and nothing less ... the most important thing to me is my family and friends,” he wrote in one.

Now, family and friends struggle to deal with his absence — “and try to say goodbye to one we loved so dearly,” wrote his cousin, Nicole Coudriet, in an impact letter for the court.

A few streets away is another family who, Teresa acknowledges, doesn’t know the pain of losing a child.

Their child, Tom, will return to Fitch High School in the fall, where he gets good grades, his mother and father said. He too might like to enter the military some day.

The pain from the accident is different for the Spickers. Instead of a great loss, it’s a heavy burden.

“My family will get through this some way, somehow,” Teresa said. “We’re not a family that doesn’t care.”