Free porn on Web is cause for alarm

Dear Annie: I've been happily married for more than 10 years and have a toddler. I always knew that my husband occasionally watched pornographic videos on the Internet, and it never really bothered me. Now I think maybe I was wrong.
I discovered that last year, my husband created a free personal profile on an online dating site that is designed to meet women in our vicinity. Of course, I was crushed. Before I approached my husband, I checked our computer history to see what sites had been visited, what kind of e-mails he has been getting, and any other surprises. Fortunately, I found nothing except the fact that he did not answer any of the responses to his profile.
I told my husband how hurt and disappointed I am. He claims that because the dating sites are free (unlike the porn sites), it's a convenient way to receive online sexy pictures of women. So for him, it's just free porn.
Am I insane to believe his reasoning? He hasn't lied to me (as far as I know) since we've been married. He apologized for his actions, deleted his profile and has been on his best behavior. He offered to go to marriage counseling and anything else to save our marriage. I haven't pushed the counseling thing because everything else in our marriage seems to be back to normal.
I haven't spoken about this to anyone. Am I doing the right thing? Depressed and Disappointed
Dear Depressed: We actually believe your husband used the profile only to get free porn, but it eventually could have gotten out of hand, especially since the women were local, so it's good he stopped. We think you should take him up on his offer to get marriage counseling. It can help both of you understand and deal with this issue more completely and, we hope, regain your trust.
Dear Annie: I have been friends with "Martina" for a while. My husband and I helped her move when she separated from her husband, and pitched in numerous times with baby-sitting, fixing things in her house, splitting wood for the winter, etc. Of course, there was no charge -- she was a friend.
Martina recently got back together with her husband. She called and invited me to have lunch at a restaurant at her in-laws' resort. I had out-of-town guests, so I declined. She told me, "No problem -- bring your friends along." So, we all went and had a great lunch. And then she presented me with the bill.
Needless to say, I was stunned. I paid the bill (for five people), then phoned Martina later and told her this was not right. We got into a big argument, and she said, "Did you think this was free?" I replied, "Well, yes, you invited me." Am I wrong? Eagerly Awaiting Your Answer
Dear Eager: You are not wrong. Martina invited you to lunch, picked the place, and should have paid the bill. If she expected you to pay for yourself and four guests, she should have made it clear when she issued the invitation.
Dear Annie: I read the letter from "Lonely Teen Lacking a Dog." You should also have suggested he talk to his parents about fostering a dog. That way he can have a dog and prove to the parents that he is a responsible owner.
There are many rescue organizations that are looking for foster families. I would not have my dog if it weren't for one such foster family that took care of my companion until we found each other. Proud Owner of a Fostered Animal
Dear Proud Owner: Thank you so much for mentioning this wonderful program. Anyone interested in fostering an animal should contact their local humane society.
E-mail your questions to anniesmailbox@com-cast.net, or write to: Annie's Mailbox™, P.O. Box 118190, Chicago, IL 60611.
Creators Syndicate
Copyright 2007 Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.