HOLIDAYS At this year's parties, try to be fashionably early

If you arrive late, you will miss out on food, free drinks and events, and you might be considered rude.
By ELIZABETH WELLINGTON
KNIGHT RIDDER NEWSPAPERS
You're dressed and ready for your happening party. The makeup is glossy and sparkling; the shave is smooth. You've even tucked a bit of mistletoe in your pocket.
The soiree starts at 8 p.m., and it's only 7:30. You're making good time. Go ahead! Grab a cocktail before traveling half an hour to the shindig. Cool people never show up at parties on time anyway, right?
Wrong.
Promptness is the latest trend at social gatherings these days. And as holiday hoopla kicks into full gear, it's important to know that if you roll in more than an hour after start time, you won't be fashionably late. You'll be rude.
"People tend to be turning up more on time," said Angus Winchester, director of the International Playboy Association in London. The association hosted the Royal World Premiere Party for "Die Another Day," the latest James Bond film, and the holiday party for the Scotch & amp; Whiskey Association.
Not missing out
"When you come late, you miss out on the attractions, the special drinks, the hot food, and the free bar. People don't want to miss out, so they are coming on time."
Showing up on time is becoming fashionable for several reasons, which stem largely from the slow economy, Winchester said.
People are saving their funds for a rainy day instead of throwing lavish events. Fewer parties mean guests aren't double-booking -- going to more than one party a night -- so they are more likely to arrive on time. A slower economy also means less money to spend on spirits, which means early arrivals get to take full advantage.
In addition, folks are having more event-driven parties that feature festive drinks and hors d'oeuvres, said Honore Ervin, one-half of the Etiquette Grrls. Ervin and Lesley Carlin are the authors of "The Etiquette Grrls: Things You Need to Be Told" (Berkely $9.95), a book of manners for the modern-day woman.
If you are late, Ervin said, you miss the presentation or the activity.
"It's more than about socializing, it's about being kind to the hostess. She went through a lot of expense to do something nice for you. If you are late and you don't show up, you have said you don't care. That's hurtful."
That will be especially true this year of Liz Barszczewski's New Year's Eve party. The 29-year-old public-relations manager for the National Constitution Center is getting married at a small, private ceremony. Barszczewski is asking guests to arrive half an hour early.
"If they are later than that, they are going to have to stand out in the cold and look into the windows," Barszcewski said. "I have huge punctuality issues. It just shows respect."
Company parties
Company parties are often the most important social events of the year -- those rare opportunities employees have to nosh with their superiors. So it's even more important to be on time, Ervin said.
Party planners at Peco Energy Co. agree. Each year, the company hosts 12 Christmas galas for its 2,500 employees. It's true that no one wants to be the first to show up, said Cathy Engel, a company spokeswoman and party planner. Still, people make sure they get there early enough to have meaningful face-time with the bosses. That means within the first hour.
"If they are any later than that, it meant they were at another company business function and they let people know they would be late," Engel said. "But coming more than an hour late for no good reason is not good at all."
Rules can be bent a little if you've been invited to a holiday open house, Winchester, of the International Playboy Association, said. But even then, if your tardiness is going to exceed two hours because of last-minute Christmas shopping, it's only fair you let your hostess know.
Amy Fullem, 31, was expecting close to 75 guests at a holiday open house at her Wynnewood, Pa., home. Fullem expected her out-of-town guests to be prompt and stay most of the night. But she was more flexible about the arrival times of local chums who may have other work and family functions.
"I didn't want people to feel like they had to make a choice," she said of her gathering, which this year features mini-cheesesteaks and hoagies.
"A couple of my good friends have other engagements. I understand that. I want it to be relaxed, but I want people to come in enough time so they can have a good time."
If you just can't bring yourself to be on time, then check with your host before coming late. He may be like Chris DiGeorge.
DiGeorge, who lives in Whitemarsh, Pa., and works in real estate, doesn't begrudge his guests the right to double-book as long as they show up for his annual Champagne and Snowball Party. The champagne will flow all night, and each room will have hot food until the last person goes home.
Punctuality has no place at a party, DiGeorge said.
"You can't be too late for my party unless you don't show up at all," he said. "Then it's your loss, not mine."